How Editors Judge What Job Applicants Bring 2 The Table

Would you do that sort of research if you were applying for the Yankees job at the Daily News? For the person who wants the job in question, they should treat it like that.

 

My test to aspiring sports writing applicants:

1. Better writer: HST, Hemingway or Wolfe? Convince me in 400 words.
Wolfe. Just personal taste. Love all three.

2. More socially significant: Pearl Jam or Nirvana? Compare and contrast in 325 words.
Nirvana. Pearl Jam was the Ratt of alt-rock.

3. Your favorite Ramone and why. 200 words.
Johnny. Hey, I'm a guitarist.

4. Biggest fraud: Lupica, Notre Dame football or Kelvin Sampson? 600 words
Kelvin Sampson.

5. Who wins, Godzilla or Mothra? 150 words.
Godzilla always wins, man.

6. Bushmills or Jameson's? No limit.
Miller Lite.

7. Donna Martin. Hit it or not? 300 words.
Post or pre boob job?

8. Worst sports franchise ever - Arizona Cardinals, LA Clippers, Tampa Bay Devil Rays? 250 words.
No Cincinnati Bengals?

9. Most honest/relevant - Chuck D., Obama or Kanye? 420 words
Chuck D

10. Bonus question: Describe Otto Graham? 20 words or less
Browns quarterback with a weird number. Retired too early.

 

All that work, all that research for a job I may not even get to interview for just seems like too much. If you're deep into the interview process, coming up with story ideas and ideas for sources is one thing. But as a first-round test, before they apparently even read your clips -- it's just too much.

As for learning the who's who of your beat, you shouldn't have to do that just to get the interview. I've got my own job to worry about before I go taking the time to put that kind of work into a job I may not even get to interview for.

But maybe that's the point. Maybe Springfield just wants to hire someone they know desperately wants the job. Someone who'd kill for it. This kind of application process insures that anyone who's only kinda sorta interested gets left behind.

 

If that's the case, they'd be limiting their pool of candidates from the high end. There may be people right now with good jobs who would consider this, but don't have the time nor the inclination of being put through the ringer. Eliminating good applicants from the field while leaving desperate ones is not a good idea.

 

I'm not arguing with you. I just can't imagine any other reason for such a tedious application process than they want to make sure they get someone who'd kill for the job. They may assume that anyone that interested in covering Mo. State women's sports -- a mid-major college's women's sports program -- would do a bang-up job once hired.

They could fish for story ideas simply by asking applicants to include one or two in their cover letter with an idea for a source or two with each. So I don't think that's their intention, although if they get a good story idea or six, I don't think they'll disregard them. And that would very much piss me off if I sent them a story idea, only to not be hired and see my story idea done by someone on their staff at a later date.

 

Disqualified on questions 6 & 10. Sorry.

 

This is a test best taken drink in hand and since my wife makes a mean Mojito, and I'm on my second 32-ounce tumbler , I figure it's time to give it a whirl.

1. Fucking Hunter S. Thompson. Reason one, he made the others seem absolutely sane and almost Baptist-like by comparison. B. Even Wolfe says he's the greatest comic writer of the century. C. Depp has yet to portray Hemmingway or Wolfe. Don't know if that's good or bad.

2. I'll tell you who's socially significant: Soundgarden. End of story. Nirvana was necessary so Gruhl could go on and form Foo Fighters. But Nirvana gets an edge on Pearl Jam, which is trying to be taken more seriously now in retrospect. TOO LATE EDDIE!

3. Joey. When you think of the Ramones, you think of Joey's gangly, Lerch-with-long-hair look and a stick of glue.

4. Notre Dame. I saw that sorry excuse for a powerhouse program in the Sugar Bowl last year. A lot of guys who need to find themselves a nice I-AA program...

5. Godzilla. That only deserves a one-word answer.

6. I'll tell a story. My brother and I walk into Kerry Irish Pub on Decateur (my it rest in peace). I order a Bushmill's, neat. He goes for the Crown and Seven. Bartender gives us two Bushmills, neat. My brother appreciates the fine Irish whiskey for what it is, so he doesn't correct the bartender. But when he's done, he says to the bartender "I enjoyed the Bushmills, but I'll be having my Crown and Seven now." The bartender hands him a Bushmills, neat...

7. I would not hit Donna Martin. My wife told me to type that and fuck it, I'll go along (after all, it's just Tori Spelling).

8. Such a limited choice! I go Clippers because one can see some light at the end of the tunnel for the others...maybe.

9. What, no Flavor? What can be more honest than the Flavor or Love? I mean, these limited choices, geesh...

10. Kneeling on the field, face full of blood, wishing somebody would invent the face mask.

 

Ding! Ding! Ding! We have a legitimate interview candidate, who submitted strong answers, filed while drinking, which shows both a keen intellect and a certain devil-may-care nihilism, too.

The only weak spot? "My wife told me to type that ... "

Congratulations, young man, you just might be Plain-Dealer material.

 

I'd get busy slandering those scumsuckers at every opportunity.

 

Unfortunately I spelled Decatur Street "Decateur." I've been eliminated from consideration in Springfield, Mo...