Help! I need some motivation!

So I have nothing to do today.

I love football.

There are a ton of college football games on today, but really, who are we kidding, these are simply exhibition games. Aside from watching Wisconsin play for a bit (Hi, Joe Thomas, ever been to Cleveland?) I'm very apathetic toward all this.

So... I need someone to motivate me to get fired up about today, otherwise I'm thinking of renting Little Miss Sunshine while the ball and chain makes some porkchops.

 

Hey, it's alright. Little Miss Sunshine is sitting on our coffee table ready to go. But the ball and chain is making me cheeseburgers.

Save the movie until later. Take a nap and watch the Rose Bowl.

 

And it involves balls and a chain.

 

Maybe some leather straps and large studs, too. Very Bad Things would be a good movie to watch in those situations.

 

I prefer "the battle ax" as opposed to the Ball and Chain. That's just me.

 

Now we know who Lorena Bobbitt wed after chopping off John's bobbitt.

 

Get off your ass, and scoop the walk you lazy fuck! [everyotherwifeinamericawhosehusbandcomplainswhenheisbored]

 

What do you expect? He's a Browns fan.

 

Ex post facto, I hope you found motivation to stick it out through Boise State. Rekindled my interest in college football, even if there will never be another game quite like that one.