Going to confession today. Any ideas?

Since my wife is converting to Catholicism, she's going through all the Catholic rites over a 9-month period. As a good husband (and 'cause she's making me do all the things she has to do) I'm going to confession today for the first time since I was in 4th grade!

In a way, it's a good way to take inventory of your life and think, "What are my faults?"

I've gotten some guidance on how/what to confess, but it still freaks me out a little bit. Also, there's no privacy curtains or anything like that. One-on-one confessions!

Anyone gone through this lately? Was it totally weird? Should I mention that homeless guy I ran over in college? (joking)

 

Bless me father for I have sinned.

I had impure thoughts.

I took the lord's name in vain.

I killed a drifter to get an erection.

 

Here you go: "I shot the sheriff, but I did not shoot the deputy."

 

It should essentially be the same as it was when you were a kid.
The only difference is now you're an adult, so the priest won't be attracted to you.

 

I'm going to go with tell the truth.

 

One-on-one confessions...gulp...I had to go through those as a youngster in Catholic grade school. Nothing perverted happened, but it was pretty uncomfortable.

 

I was in about fourth or fifth grade when we switched to face-to-face confessions. Man, that wasn't fun.

 

Take write-brained with you. He has REALLY sinned.

In all seriousness, though, tell the truth.

Edit: apparently, I'm not awake yet.

 

I would just make something up... that's what my Catholic friends did when we were growing up. Even then, they were sensible enough to know that saying, "I cut in the lunch line," was a lot wiser than letting the priest get off on the various -- ahem -- sins of 13-year-old boys.

 

While you're there, snag me some Holy wine.

 

Here's a confession for you. I'm sure glad I'm not Catholic.

 

Here's another tip: Try not to get hard.