Freaks at Wal-Mart

I don't go to WalMart, but it's not like you can avoid the Star Wars bar by shopping elsewhere. They're everywhere.

 

Compared to the slot room at any casino, Wal-Mart is the Oak Room at the Waldorf.

 

This is true.
I was playing blackjack one evening at the local casino and had a nice collection of society's dregs seated around me. One guy was drunk, fumbling for chips and making bad bets all over the place. Another guy looked like he was down to his last $20 in life and trying to make his big comeback at the $3 blackjack table.
A woman in the middle was on the way to getting hammered and flirting with the dealer. And then there two Vietnamese guys, seemed to be an older guy and his grandson. The younger one tried to do something stupid, like hit a 14 against the dealer's 4, and the old guy started scolding him with something that can only be described as angry dolphin clicks.

 

Batman (right) hits on 17.

 

Try going to a dirt-track race sometime. Last time I had to cover one, my fun little game of "Count the Mullett" was overloaded by the time I got in the gate.

But the topper was the one gentleman who wore his Hawaiian-style shirt wide open to show off his massive gut tat. Said gut tat depicted a desert (maybe tropical??) oasis of sorts. One nipple contained the sun. The belly was transformed into a pool of aqua water, from which a zebra drank.

My thoughts:
1. How much did all of this fucking cost?
2. How do you reach the conclusion one day that life won't be sweet until there's a depection of a zebra drinking from a massive pool of water etched on your belly?
3. Um.. why?

 

Why would anyone look that closely at something like that? Guy has an open shirt, I'm looking away, tat or no tat.

 

You just have no appreciation for fine belly art, Frank

 

It's probably like looking at the sun: It won't do you anything but harm, yet you have trouble looking away.

 

Did someone say belly tattoo?

I had one of those in my avatar, before it got shouted down.

 

Lets just say it demanded attention. It's not every day someone splatters ROY G. BIV all over their ample midsection.

 

I thought Bubbler had the Walmart copyright?

 

Went to Walmart tonight to get a couple of DVDs for a friend's birthday present.

Got stuck in a 20-minute checkout line behind some guy who smelled like he hadn't wiped his ass since Reagan was in office.