Epic Luxury Price Inflation

I paid $1.25 for a regular package of Reese's Peanut Butter Cups last night at this gas station that shouldn't have been that shitty.

Not King Size. Not ice cream. Regular, two cups.

 

I grew up on cheap TP. Never knew any better. Got married, was introduced to real TP and won't ever go back. I could be starving with $5 to my name an I'll hunt to survive if I can have some good TP.

 

I skimp on a lot, but not in this area. In fact, I can't live without those Cottonelle wipes now, either...

 

Was talking with the wife last night at dinner about our finances, and made the joke that we'll soon be able to wipe our asses with $100 bills (obviously just joking). Then I thought that would make a good life goal — and a phenomenal "F-you" present.
Before I die, I will wipe my ass with some large denomination. Maybe not a $100, but definitely a $20 or a $50. Then I'll put it in a Christmas or birthday card and send it to someone I hate.

 

The worst is when you need to feed the Porcelain King during a high school basketball game, and of course all they have in the bathroom is those sheets which give your taint paper cuts. Once, I went to a school where the TP was Charmin soft. Otherwise, I would rather wipe with 90 grit sandpaper.

 

Most high school bathrooms I've been in rarely have any kind of toilet paper. Or doors on the stalls, for that matter.