Does anyone want a subscription to my paper?

Because apparently we're hurting.

A few hours ago, my ME got a phone call at his desk from Susan (or whatever), the friendly Mertville Journal-Register-Transcript-World-Times-Union-News representative. She wanted to know if he'd be interested in a subscription to the Mertville JRTWTUN. As in, the paper in whose office he was sitting. With his name on the masthead.

Now, because he's not a smartass (like me), his reply was, "um, no, I think we're all set, but thanks."

Gotta love the random-number caller list.

 

Two years ago, the phone rang at home.

"Hello?"

"Hi, this is Jeremy from The Daily Bugle."

"Hmm. This is Johnny Dangerously from The Daily Bugle."

Click.

No comment from Jeremy. Nothing. He just hung up.

 

We had this happen at one of my former stops. They rang every single number in the office, one-by-one. You could just watch it go around the room. Funny shit.

 

Happened in our shop, too. Every number, in order.

 

I, for one, would like a subscription just to see how much space you have to run copy after plastering "Mertville Journal-Register-Transcript-World-Times-Union-News" across the top.

 

It's in Helvetica.

 

My competing newspaper used to call me and ask me if I wanted a subscription and I would tell them who I worked for. Normally they would quickly hang up.

 

Yesterday the local daily rag calls our office trying to sell a script. I tell them they've called the weekly and that we already get their paper. Two minutes later, same paper different caller. Two minutes later, same thing. Two minutes later I called the person to lick my (insert body part here).

 

Condensed.

 

What is the weather like in Mertville this time of year anyway?

 

Tracked in, negative-12.

Strong: Warm, with just a hint of possible blizzard conditions at any given moment.

EDIT: Holy crap, this was my 3,000th post. What a waste.

 

Though I prefer Impact large, I've really enjoyed heds in Times bold italics 30 pt. Looks great in 2 decks, 2 or 3 columns.