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Death of a family member

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by jakewriter82, Jun 17, 2007.

  1. jakewriter82

    jakewriter82 Active Member

    So I post this not in search of sympathy but advice from maybe those who have dealt with this before.

    My 86-year-old grandpa is in the hospital and is deathly ill.
    He'll probably be lucky to make it to Tuesday. I'm saddened, but I understand he's old and it's his time.
    So assuming he doesn't make it to Tuesday, my family will undoubtedly schedule the funeral on Thursday or Friday.
    Which, presents a few problems.
    One, I'm supposed to be flying for a job interview on Friday. I'm pretty sure they'd understand if I explained what happened, that's not my concern.
    I already have my plane ticket bought and I don't fly much so I can't say I know if they'd let me reschedule or not.
    Second, because the shop I work for right now is very small, time off is a luxury I don't typically see.
    I took Thursday and Friday off this week and I'm expected to do the extra work before then to fill my pages for Friday's paper.
    If I told them I needed an extra two days off NEXT week as well, they'd undoubtedly be none too happy seeing as I just took two days off the previous week.
    So at this point I'm hoping my grandpa makes it to Wednesday. I'd feel as if I were letting my family down if I didn't attend his funeral, but I REALLY REALLY want to get out of my current job so I want to get to this interview as soon as possible.
    Any suggestions?
  2. mike311gd

    mike311gd Active Member

    Obviously, you hope for the best, and you don't know the final dates yet, again, for obvious reasons. But maybe you could go to the wake and miss out on the funeral. Or, tell your shop that you're not going to be able to be there, no questions asked. Tell them you had personal engagements that needed to be pushed back to next week because of your grandpa's situation, and there's no way you're skipping the funeral.

    People do understand sometimes.
  3. Jones

    Jones Active Member

    I hate to be harsh, Jake, but your talking about hoping your grandpa holds on so you can make a job interview sounds shallow as hell.

    Without him, you don't exist.
  4. jakewriter82

    jakewriter82 Active Member

    Yeah, good point.
    Maybe I need to re-evaluate some things.
    It's been a hard few days. He's been doing decent, but the writing's on the wall and it's only a matter of time.
  5. mike311gd

    mike311gd Active Member

    It may sound shallow, but it is a logical thought. If I were in his position, and hopefully I never am, I'd go to the funeral without hesitation. But those thoughts would still be in my mind. It's human nature.
  6. Big Game

    Big Game Member

    I tried to post this earlier, but got booted by my crappy DSL.

    I know you probably didn't mean it to come off like that, but the part where you said "So at this point, I'm hoping my grandpa makes it to Wednesday." really rubbed me the wrong way. It's like you want your grandpa to schedule his passing to fit your schedule.
    Again, I know you probably didn't mean it like that, but the wording sucked.

    That said, I'd reschedule. Attend the funeral (whenever it may be) and then reschedule your interview. If you do well on your interview, you'll be leaving your job soon anyway. Good luck with both the interview and with your grandpa. My prayers are with you and your family.
  7. buckweaver

    buckweaver Active Member

    You only get one chance to say goodbye to your grandpa. Jobs come and go. Don't do something you will regret.
  8. Jones

    Jones Active Member

    Oh, I don't doubt that, mike.

    I'm just thinking, I'd hope the other people involved (like Jake's boss and his future boss) would understand. We're not talking about a second cousin once removed here.

    And if they didn't understand, I think I'd try to make them, probably with a claw hammer.

    Then again, my grandparents all died young, so I'm kinda envious of folks who've had them as part of their lives. I think sometimes grandparents get taken for granted -- except by people who've never had them.

    Jake, again, I think you'll regret not being there.
  9. shotglass

    shotglass Guest

    At the risk of sounding coarse, he could very well regret not jumping at an opportunity to get somewhere better.
  10. jakewriter82

    jakewriter82 Active Member

    Yeah, the wording sucked.
    I'm too close to my grandparents to not attend the funeral. Maybe I'm seeing the forest for the trees? Not seeing the forest for the trees? Something like that.
    I only have one grandpa but there'll be many other job interviews.
    It seems that when it comes to things like this, life has a funny way of working everything out. It's just nerve-wracking thinking about the possibilities.
  11. Jones

    Jones Active Member

    Junkie, that's a cheap shot.
  12. markvid

    markvid Guest

    Ok, guys, please don't let this one degenerate.
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