Customer Service Facepalm moments

I just experienced one of those moments in dealing with a customer service rep where you can't believe the stupidity of the question they ask.

Phone company rep: What's the problem with your phone?
Me: I have no dial tone, there's just static on the line.
Phone company rep: Are you calling from the number you're having trouble with?
Me: No, I'm calling from my cell. I just told you I have no dial tone, how can I make a call without a dial tone? (I had to a facepalm there because of the stupidity of her question)

(Yes - I know I'm so 90s or 00s because I still have a home phone instead of just a cell, but cell reception in my house can be hit or miss at times)

 

Me: "I'm interested in an out-the-door price for (this vehicle). I probably have a trade-in and financing is already taken care of."
Dealership: "Price depends on credit and paperwork. When can you come in to talk with someone in F&I?"

 

I've worked in service businesses so this shit drives me crazy.

I need new window coverings. Sales Guy comes out to house.

Guy: which bedroom is which?
Me: I don't care which room you call Bedroom One and which room you call Two.
Guy: You have three bedrooms
Me: Where's the third bedroom?
(guy points to a room I had previously shown him and called a storage room)
Me: That isn't a bedroom. It has a window but it's too small. It's a storage room.
Guy: No, it's a bedroom.
Me: I said it's a storage room. It's my house. It's a storage room.
Guy: Here are all the wood blind samples. These are the only samples I brought in.
Me: I never said I want wood blinds. I don't like wood blinds. I don't want wood blinds.
Guy: But they are very popular.
(guy reluctantly goes to car and brings in other types of window covering samples)
Me: What's the difference between this and that?
Guy: This is cheaper so you should look at that.
Me: So other than that, they are the same?
Guy: No, the more expensive one has options not available in the cheaper one. You should look at the cheaper one.
Me: What if I want options that are only available in the more expensive one? Can you show me the differences.
Guy: Here are the sample books.

After two visits of 2 hours each with nothing getting decided, I told him I'd be getting my blinds elsewhere. Sales Guy 2 from a different company great.

 

"I don't know"
"THIRD BASE!"

 

Hotel in Chicago a good 15 years ago or so, checking in on a Friday for a Bears football weekend. Had booked the room straight through them. I knew going in there was trouble to be had, as there were about 2 dozen people in the lobby in some state of yelling, arguing or just being pissed off.

Me: Hi, I have a reservation under BWIP for a king bed no-smoking room.
Clerk: Yeah, I'm sorry, we don't have any non-smoking rooms available, or rooms with king beds. I can get you a smoking room with 2 double beds.
Me: Here's my confirmation number, for the king non-smoking. How do you not have it?
Clerk: We're sold out of them. All I can get you is a smoking with 2 doubles.

That denigrated into the Seinfeld routine of what the reservation means, him saying a reservation just means you have a room, and me saying a reservation with these details spelled out means I get a room with these details. A good 10 minutes later, we get to this point.

Clerk: I do have a king non-smoking room, but it hasn't been cleaned and I don't have anyone in housekeeping to clean it. If you want to clean it, you can have it.
Me: What?
Clerk: You heard me. You can clean that room and have it, you can take the smoking with 2 doubles, or you can leave. Those are your choices.
Me: WHAT?
Clerk: OK, wait, I just found a king non-smoking room.

He checks us in and we go to the room. King bed? Check. On the desk, a dirtier-than-ass ashtray and the entire room smells like a smoking lounge. I call down there and we yell at each other for another 5 minutes.

On Monday, I faxed a 2-page letter into the company's corporate office detailing the entire exchange, and get a phone call about 10 minutes later from the hotel manager. She said they had received dozens of complaints about that person, and he had been fired that morning. Then she gave me 2 free nights at the location.