Crazy Mother-In-Laws

Shockey, I think it's the same male vs. female principle that makes you never notice the laundry on the floor, or that the bathroom really needs to be done. Obliviousness by design

 

Man, praise the Lord, I have a great one. We never would have survived our child's first year without her help, and she lives 1500 miles away.

She visits for a week or 10 days every year to see the grandkid play soccer, etc., and is always ready, willing and able to do whatever we ask. Micro Jr. just asked the other day, "When is gramma coming back out?"

This thread makes me appreciate her even more.

 

I have the perfect mother-in-law situation. She doesn't speak English, so even if she did say something negative I probably wouldn't understand it.

However, she is unbelievably nice to me. The biggest problem is that I can't get her to stop making food for me. She was at our house last year and made tamales at Christmas - they were terrific and we still had some in the freezer in May, when we decided it might be a good idea to throw them out. She has bought a couple of shirts for me, and she always asks about my parents. She's one of the most generous people on the face of the earth.

 

My mother-in-law doesn't speak English, either.

 

Had a co-worker whose MIL had that wondrous contry-fried tendency to end up - and stay with - men who mistreated her. Until one night the man in question threatened to come by and mistreat her a little too harshly, and my co-worker had to swing by her house, get her and take her to a women's shelter before the guy showed up with weapon in tow.

Which wasn't any cheese on my crackers, except for the fact I was with my co-worker in his pickup truck when the call came through at the time. Which pretty much put me in the line of fire, too.

Afterward, I listened to said co-worker blather on about how trashy he thought his MIL to be. Which is funny, since his own wife and daughter up and left him for rather good reasons one summer day.

Sure glad I flirted with getting an assful of buckshot for that guy and his MIL. :

 

This definitely isn't my situation, but can anyone relate?

MONSTER IN LAW
words & music by Slaid Cleaves

My girl and I settled down
We were as happy as we could be
We thought we were doing alright
But her momma and I didn't agree
No matter how hard I try to please her
She's the meanest woman you ever saw
Lordy she ain't my momma she's my monster in law

Monster in law
She's got breath of fire
Monster in law
Calls me a bum and a liar
Monster in law
She's always pickin a fight
Monster in law
I can't do nothin' right
She's gonna track me down start wagging her jaw
Lordy she ain't my momma she's my monster in law

Her daughter's pure as the driven snow
And she deserves a shining white knight
But she ended up with me somehow
And momma won't give up without a fight
I know that I'm not perfect
But she picks on my every flaw
Lordy she ain't my momma she's my monster in law

Monster in law
Fe fi fo fum
Monster in law
She's big and mean as they come
Monster in law
Gives me the evil eye
Monster in law
Get on your broom and fly, fly, fly

She's got a hair on her chin, a wart on her nose
On her back is a big old hump
And I know if I reached out a hand to her
I'd pull back a bloody stump

Monster in law
She's like a bad dream
Monster in law
She makes me want to scream
Monster in law
She's coming round the bend
Monster in law
I'll hit the road again
I see her arch her back and sharpen up each claw
Lordy she ain't my momma
Oh god tell me she ain't my momma
Lordy she ain't my momma, she's my monster in law
(Munsters theme on accordian)

 

and who can forget this classic, from Ernie K. Doe...

(Mother in Law) Mother In Law
(Mother in Law) Mother In Law

The worst person I know
(Mother-in law, mother-in law)
(Mother-in law, mother-in law)
A she worries me, so
If she'd leave us alone
A we would have a happy home
Sent from down below

Mother in Law Mother in Law

Satan should be her name
To me they're bout the same
Every time I open my mouth
She steps in, tries to put me out
How could she stoop so low

[Instrumental Interlude]

I come home with my pay
She asks me what I made
She thinks her advice is the constitution
But if she would leave that would be the solution
And don't come back no more

Mother in law
My......mother in law, ah
Oh yeah

 

You know, I'd like to say my future mil is bad, but I know she's just looking out for her son and for our future. I also know that she is a very strong-willed woman, and that won't ever change, so I will get used to it and survive just fine with her.

 

my MIL speaks a little bit of english.....but my FIL doesn't speak any. They've been at my house that last 2 weeks, and will be leaving in 2 weeks. I'm very lucky, they're excellent people.... who welcomed me into their family. I've dealt with some personal issues that aren't common in their family, and they've been saints.......I can say I truly love my in-laws.

BUT....having your in-laws living with you for a month is never easy...the biggest problem I'm having is with my FIL. He refuses to stop puttering, and tinkering with my house. It's no surprise....but I don't need to talk about the floor in the half-bath downstairs on X-mas.

But, respect your elders!!!! The next time spnited, JR, Fenian or the rest of scooter patrol say something ridiculous, remember....they're old, they wear diapers...give 'em a break.
;-)

 

For the well-being of my fiancee, I wish I could tell you such things were isolated incidents. The truth is that I selected the worst of a large number of such stories for emphasis on the fact that it's a miracle my fiancee is such a sweet-hearted girl.

The MIL essentially treats me as though I don't exist, other than to occasionally bitch about me to the fiancee. Really, that part could be worse. What's abominable is having to continually pick up the broken pieces of my fiancee who (at least for the first couple of years) continually believed her mother would come around one of these days. The respirator incident purged that fantasy, thankfully for all.

As Moddy said, take the MILs in stride, at least in 90 percent of the cases listed here. I'm sure your girl/guy is worth it, or else you wouldn't be venting about it here -- you'd be looking for a new squeeze. In my case, well ... I'm learning to cope with the realities. We may all choose to be in our relationships, but love kinda chooses you sometimes and you make the best of the storm that surrounds it.

 

Not singling anyone out, but I feel quite confident in saying a lot of the crazy mothers-in-law described in this thread have even crazier, whinier, dumber sons and daughters-in-law.