Brian Posehn/Stuff names the The 10 Most Ridiculous Metal Album Covers

http://www.stuffmagazine.com/articles/index.aspx?id=1414

I love No. 9.

9. Manowar, Into Glory Ride
Drummer auditions:
"Loincloths and a handlebar moustache? Yeah, I'll join your band. Will it be metal?"
"Oh yeah, the most metal."
"Will it be gay?"
"Yeah, the most gay."

 

"A greased, naked woman on all fours with a dog collar around her neck, and a leash and a man’s arm extended out up to here holding on to the leash and pushing a black glove in her face to sniff it."

David: "You know, if we were serious and we said, ‘Yes, she should be forced to smell the glove,’ then you’d have a point, but it’s all a joke."
Nigel: "It is and it isn’t. She should be made to smell it, but..."
David: "But not, you know, over and over."

 

Excellent...

 

It's interesting that the Stuff site also offers a link to the greatest metal album covers as chosen by Martin Popoff, Sam Dunn and Scot McFadyen for last month's issue of Blender. "Look What The Cat Dragged In" by Poison makes both lists.

Stuff's take, July 11, 2006:
"I'm gonna have that cat put down. It keeps dragging shitty bands in here. I remember the "who are these ladies?" reaction I had when I first saw this album at Tower Records in Sacramento in 1986. I also remember putting it down and grabbing Megadeth."

Blender's take, June 2006:
"This is one of those "best of the worst" arguments. But it's here because Poison concocted the most shamelessly glam look out of anybody, then laughed all the way to the bank — a case of extreme going mainstream. Look What the Cat Dragged In has the band looking like hot chicks, and ushers in the big hair and spandex that only Kurt Cobain could crush years later. None of the manly bits of metal enter this four-square picture, leaving only the incongruous name of the band to dish belligerence. OK, OK — this entry is what they call a little light relief."

You know, there's another one that could probably go either way.

"Slide It In" by Whitesnake

This may be NSFW -- I linked it to stay on the safe side.

 

All I am seeing is a big black box... or is that the joke I am not getting?

 

Rent yourself some Spinal Tap

 

Yeah, rent it and put the volume up to 11.