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Be Puffy's right-hand man!

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Highway 101, Apr 18, 2007.

  1. Highway 101

    Highway 101 Active Member

    Should this go in the "JOBS" section?

    Prominent busy Chairman of an entertainment giant is seeking a top-notch
    experienced polished Personal Assistant to coordinate the Chairman's
    business, social and personal affairs. This role involves handling business
    and personal tasks at the Chairman's office and multiple homes (NY, FL &
    GA). Serve as a personal liaison between the Chairman and his family. It is
    imperative that the Assistant has the sophistication to communicate
    effectively with people at all levels of management and handle highly
    confidential matters. Due to the Chairman's extremely busy schedule, the
    Assistant needs to be accessible on weekends and evenings to handle ongoing

    Job Summary:
    · Ensure that all personal aspects of Chairman's life are covered, including
    tight scheduling (keep him on time); anticipate his needs in order to ensure
    that all the information he requires is always at hand. Interact with
    industry executives and talent; manage/maintain personal calendar. Secure
    personal supplies. Responsible for Chairman's personal expenses. Manage
    expenditures & petty cash. Handle personal projects. Prepare correspondence,
    when required, consistent with general direction from Chairman and Chief of

    · Respond expeditiously to diverse assignments and take responsibility for
    projects from beginning to end. Consistently operate with a sense of urgency
    while not losing sight of the details!

    · This is a TRUE on-call 24/7 position.

    · Will travel nationally and internationally; coordinate with Wardrobe
    Manager to pack clothing selection for business and personal trips.
    · No task is too small. Candidate must have "whatever it takes" attitude.

    Qualifications/ Requirements:
    · Ideal candidate will have a minimum of (3) years experience with a
    well-known businessman and/or senior level executive (CEO, Chairman).

    · TYPE A Personality

    · Commitment to excellence. Unwavering loyalty. Team player; consistently
    sharing and communicating information.

    · Reliable, trustworthy, flexible- CONFIDENTIALITY A MUST. Always operate
    with discretion.

    · Outstanding computer skills are required including but not limited to
    proficiency in MS Word, Excel, Power Point, Blackberry, IPOD and the

    · Able to maintain composure in an extremely fast paced,
    entrepreneurial/ creative fluid environment.

    · Exceptional interpersonal skills; must be charismatic and have ability to
    communicate respectfully with all walks of life.

    · Possess impeccable attention to detail; outstanding time management
    skills; work quickly and efficiently.

    · Able to work under tight deadlines; remain aware of shifting priorities;
    anticipate last "second" changes. Always have a plan B in place.

    · Self-managed; skilled at managing a high volume of work and deciphering
    what's immediate from what can wait.

    · Manage tasks and projects to successful outcomes; communicate and
    · Must be highly-connected in NY (knowledge of the top restaurants,
    nightclubs, and best chefs) and if uncertain MUST have the resources in
    place to find out.

    · Must be able to travel internationally. Must possess a valid driver's
    license. Bilingual preferred but not necessary.

    Marilyn Van Alstyne
    Human Resources
    resumes@badboyworld wide.com
    (212) 381.2069 (fax)
  2. boots

    boots New Member

    Does this mean I get to kiss his ass with or without lip balm?
  3. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    Boots, this has you written all over it...
  4. JackyJackBN

    JackyJackBN Guest

    Me, me! I got skillz! (Fortunately there is no mention of good looks, or hair...)
  5. The Big Ragu

    The Big Ragu Moderator Staff Member

    Isn't Don Imus looking for a job?
  6. TwoGloves

    TwoGloves Well-Known Member

    This bozo needs somebody just to keep track of his names. Puff Daddy. Puffy. P. Diddy. Diddy. Here's an idea: Sean Fucking Combs.
  7. GB-Hack

    GB-Hack Active Member

    You know, you might make fun of this, but it sure might make a fascinating position.
  8. Chuck~Taylor

    Chuck~Taylor Active Member

    Sean Combs, Puff Talentless, whatever = Overrated
  9. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    Perennially Overrated, perhaps?
  10. JackyJackBN

    JackyJackBN Guest

    Imus has hair...
  11. heyabbott

    heyabbott Well-Known Member

    Ability to handle & reload automatic & semi-automatic assault weapons.
    Ability to perform abortions in the back of a Hummer H2 limo
    Can get bitches at any hotel in North America, Europe, Asia, Africa and Dubai.
    Ability to cook crack
    Ability to make a crack pipe from 18 different kinds of inanimate objects and 6 animate objects
    Ability to get JLo back
  12. boots

    boots New Member

    Damn, leave the bigoted stereotypes out, please.
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