Attentions Sports Media: We don't give a shit about your bracket

This goes for writers, sports talk hosts, bloggers, or anyone else.

I have zero interest in your picks, zero interest in how the 4-13 upset wiped out your bracket, and zero interest in your bet with the afternoon host on who's bracket will do better.

You don't know shit about Oral Roberts, you don't know shit about Butler, you don't even know shit about Stanford. So when you pick all 1 or 2 seeds to make it to the final four, don't act like you're the second coming of Dean Smith. You guessed right and nobody gives a shit.

If you think you want to mention anything about your fucking bracket, drink a tall glass of STFU immediately.

 

So you just wanted to beat the rush?

 

What bracket are we talking about? Champions League semifinals? SWAC women's basketball?

 

What about the teachers/students bracket, Poin?

 

Attention, WORLD:

Don't care.

DON'T care.

Don't CARE.

DON'T CARE.

 

Bracket for what?

 

I'm taking Debra LaFave to win it all. I don't care if she's a 1-seed. She's the real deal, a real PTPer* BABAY!



*Professional Teaching Pedophile

 

I don't care anymore
I don't care no more
I don't care what you say
We never played by the same rules anyway

 

Have you seen my bracket?

 

Yeah, because it's so bad to write things that can engage our readers in conversation. When I do a bracket and post it on our site, it's one of the most talked-about things for several weeks on our site.

Why, then, is it bad for me to talk about my bracket?

 

I get it now. I never realize when it's NCAA tournament time because I hate basketball. All I remember is that my wife bitches like hell when CBS preempts some kind of reality show she follows.

 

Most readers seem to disagree.