Athletes and their birthday parties

Just in the past two days ....

Jacoby Jones being knocked on the melon with a champagne bottle by a stripper in a party bus during Bryant McKinnie's birthday celebration.

Pacman Jones (nice few days for Jones boys) arrested after his birthday party.

Brandon Jennings getting into a fight with a rapper at his B-Day party.

What the hell is it with these guys and their birthday parties? If I were an NFL coach I'd be banning birthday parties for any of my players born during the season.

 

No, you wouldn't.

 

Athletes should live in the barracks from the start of training camp to the last championship game, and they should be forced to masturbate in front of a team doctor every morning to remove all the toxins.

 

That was no ordinary champagne bottle...

 

NFL players also have a lot of down time. They play once a week (as opposed to 3-to-6 times like players in the other major sports) and are done with work (practice, meetings, etc.) by dark six nights a week.

 

Aren't the players a little old for Pin the Tail on the Donkey?

 

Is that good stuff? (Coming from a guy who drinks BL Lime).

 

Not to get too socio-economic...

Let's say you grew up poor, with a single mother. You couldn't have a lavish birthday party as a little boy.

Now you've got cash and nobody to say "no".

Cue the hookers and coke.

 

Geez, all the birthday parties we have -- and that these guys missed out on -- involve jumpy houses and terrible pizza. I want hookers and coke!

 

I think Nate Burleson would go for the latter in hindsight.

 

no kidding, I had some nice birthday parties growing up and I would take hookers and coke.

 

Just to be clear, when you say "boys," do you mean it as a racial epithet?