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And this year's winner of the 26th annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest

Discussion in 'Sports and News' started by JR, Aug 14, 2008.

  1. JR

    JR Well-Known Member

    Sometimes known as the "It was a dark and stormy night" contest


    The overall winner:

    “Theirs was a New York love, a checkered taxi ride burning rubber, and like the city their passion was open 24/7, steam rising from their bodies like slick streets exhaling warm, moist, white breath through manhole covers stamped, 'Forged by DeLaney Bros., Piscataway, N.J.' ”

    And a dishonourable mention goes to this woman from Double J country:

    “The penguin stood on the iceberg, cutting a striking black-on-white profile, much like the silhouette produced by a person standing behind a screen in front of a bright light while holding up a Twinkie to represent the penguin and placing it atop a Yorkshire terrier to represent the iceberg.”

    I bet there are numerous SportsJournalists.com members who could beat these for next year's contest.

    Or, God help us all, we could start a "Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest" running thread.
  2. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    Pengooins is practically chickens, you know.
  3. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    It's hard to hate you for hating America--and Krispy Kreme and Pizza Hut--when you come up with BRILLIANT ideas like this!
  4. JR

    JR Well-Known Member

    Well, that's my job.

    Keeping America on track, crappy fast food and all.
  5. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    You got that damn right.

    Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'm having a heart attack. Or a sugar rush. Or both.
  6. spnited

    spnited Active Member

    How could you possibly hate anyone for hating Krispy Kreme and Pizza Hut?
  7. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    I'm a complicated man.
  8. deskslave

    deskslave Active Member

    Anyone else rather keen on seeing what Jones might produce for a Bulwer-Lytton entry?
  9. D.Sanchez

    D.Sanchez Member

    And for brevity, if nothing else, Barry J. Drucker of Bentonville, Ark., received a miscellaneous dishonourable mention for this: “She had the kind of body that made a man want to have sex with her.”

    Damn, looks like I have to come up with a new opening line for my novel.
  10. Ace

    Ace Well-Known Member

    I liked the winner. It was funny and very well-written within the context of the contest.
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