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A Crash Davis Moment

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by lono, Feb 12, 2008.

  1. lono

    lono Active Member

    So I'm sitting in the bar last night, chillin' on a Killilans and three dozen raw oysters, when the putz next to me says, "Yes, sir, that was hotter than a two-peckered billy goat."

    And for the next 20 minutes, he and his pal ponder the phrase, until final I can't take it anymore.

    I finally look at the dude and say - in a fairly loud voice - "It's not hotter than a two-peckered billy goat, it's hornier than a two-peckered billy goat. If you're talking hot, then you say "It's hotter than a two-dollar whore." But it is not hotter than a two-peckered billy goat. Not now, not ever. Got it? Huh?"

    Swear to god, I came this close to adding, "And women don't get wooly, either."

    But I knew dumb and dumber wouldn't get it. [/crashdavisrant]
  2. bigpern23

    bigpern23 Well-Known Member

    I thought you were going to say you fucked Susan Sarandon.
  3. Flash

    Flash Guest

    Holy fuck, lono ... I'm giggling my ass off. Front-row seats would have been awesome for that.

    No one gets wooly. Women get weary. God, I hate it when people get the words wrong!
  4. Ned

    Ned New Member

    Fear and ignorance.
  5. Sxysprtswrtr

    Sxysprtswrtr Active Member

    2 peckers.

    Interesting. Concept.
  6. lono

    lono Active Member

    She was on my marital freebie list for a long time. An E-ticket attraction, no doubt, but she had to fall in love with someone who was tall, rich, a movie star and politically sympatico. Me? SOL on all fronts.
  7. Ned

    Ned New Member

    I think the line in City Slickers was "I'm as happy as a puppy with two peters."
  8. bigpern23

    bigpern23 Well-Known Member

    No, the line in City Slickers was, "I like your ass, may I wear it as a hat." :D
  9. RFB-Boy

    RFB-Boy Member

    I was always told it was hotter than prison sex, whatever it was.
  10. terrier

    terrier Well-Known Member

    I'm weary from all the stress of reading this thread.
  11. Inky_Wretch

    Inky_Wretch Well-Known Member

    Is hotter than a two-dollar whore more or less hot than two rats fucking in a wool sock?
  12. Armchair_QB

    Armchair_QB Well-Known Member

    It's time to work on your cliches.
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