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You know you're a lowlife when...

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Norman Stansfield, Jan 4, 2008.

  1. Norman Stansfield

    Norman Stansfield Active Member

  2. imjustagirl2

    imjustagirl2 New Member

    Funk dat. What's a 2-year-old going to do with $20?

    I'll bet a 30-year-old could use it more.
     
  3. ondeadline

    ondeadline Active Member

    A lowlife who, if convicted, could spend 9 1/2 years in prison.
     
  4. should have to serve every day. breaking into an occupied house at night is serious. lucky he didn't get shot. dirtbag.
     
  5. TheSportsPredictor

    TheSportsPredictor Well-Known Member

    got my Cat Scratch Fever eight-track
    My best friend's in a gun rack
    I'm a lowlife
    I owe everybody money
    I think racist jokes are funny
    I'm a lowlife
    I got a dirty mind, a gutter mouth
    I'm makin' time, I'm goin' out
    With your wife

    Cuz I'm a lowlife
    I'm a lowlife

    I got kids I never seen
    And their momma's seventeen
    I'm a lowlife
    I take strippers out to breakfast
    You can add that to my checklist
    I'm a lowlife
    Ahh the landlord called the rent is due
    I spent it all on a Kiss tattoo
    I Rock n Roll all night

    Cuz I'm a lowlife
    I'm a lowlife
    I'm a lowlife
    Livin' the highlife

    I'm watchin' porno on the TV
    Wonderin' why she'd ever leave me
    I'm a lowlife
    The object of my affection
    Asked the police for protection
    I'm a lowlife
    The romance is gone, I'm doin' fine
    Me and your mom had a real good time
    Just last night

    Cuz I'm a lowlife
    I'm a lowlife

    I make black music for the white man
    Keep cocaine upon my nightstand
    I'm a lowlife
    Ain't never hung out in the Catskills
    But I've been to jail in Nashville
    I'm a lowlife
    I've got a dirty mind, a gutter mouth
    I'm makin' time, I'm goin' out
    With your wife

    I'm a lowlife
    I'm a lowlife
    I'm a lowlife
    Livin' the highlife
     
  6. Norman Stansfield

    Norman Stansfield Active Member

    I think it's great the PD used DNA evidence to solve this crime.

    I'm also glad it didn't turn into a sexual assault.
     
  7. fishwrapper

    fishwrapper Active Member

    I just did it the other day. To MY six year old.
    My wife, unbeknownst to me, orders an antipasto salad from this new pizza joint.
    Cool. I have a $20. Nope. Not going to do it. And because my wife didn't order with a credit card, the Human Pimple at my doorstep wasn't budging.
    $27! With tip!!!
    Upstairs. Sticking the finger up the Piggy Bank's ass trying to wiggle out some $1 bills without breaking the goddamn thing. Jingling the little bastard so the paper money goes to the bottom. I felt dirty.
    So, yep. I've done it. And I still owe her eight bucks.
     
  8. EStreetJoe

    EStreetJoe Well-Known Member

    Ya beat me to it. I was just going to look up the lyrics and post a YouTube link
    John Eddie wrote it and released it first, but Kid Rock just released his version of it.
    Here's a live John Eddie performance:
     
  9. mike311gd

    mike311gd Active Member

    That's great. You just better hope she doesn't learn how to call the cops.
     
  10. fishwrapper

    fishwrapper Active Member

    My mom used to tell me: I gave you life, I can snuff you out at anytime.
    Different times, I guess.
    I felt awful over seven bucks.
     
  11. TheSportsPredictor

    TheSportsPredictor Well-Known Member

    Luv John Eddie. Didn't even know Kid Rock did a version til I looked for the lyrics. JE's version is much better, though the song does fit Kid Rock.

    I will be seeing John Eddie next week when he once again rolls through Cleveland. Always puts on a great show, usually to only about 20 people.
     
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