WTF! It's 2:35 a.m., and the guy next door is MOWING HIS LAWN.

Just another Slice of Life in Middle America. :

 

I bet Jack Bauer mows his lawn at 2:35 am.

 

Jack Bauer just stares down his grass until it cuts itself.

 

I suspect alcohol may have been involved. He seems to be having altogether too much fun. :

 

Chuck Norris mows his lawn at 3 a.m. while he's temporarily blinded after an explosion.

 

If he starts taking it apart, you'll know it's more than alcohol.

 

Call the cops. Seriously.

That's fucked up.

 

He's got an advisory board/coaching staff standing on the porch shouting out guidance and advice. More brain cells will die to get this lawn mowed than will be used to land the space shuttle.

I would, except for a few good reasons:

1) It's a city lot. 30 x 100 feet. He'll be done within 15 minutes.

2) The cops around here don't want to be bothered by anything less than assault with intent to commit.

3) If this dude gets derailed now, he probably won't mow the fucker for another month. We ain't talking Hank Hill here.

 

Wasn't this an episode of Desperate Housewives?

 

Starman, if I didn't know better, I'd think you live on my mom's street.

 

OK, the peanut gallery has retired to the beer-garden in the basement.

Mower Boy is wrapping things up. I think he's singing a medley from the Ozzy Osbourne catalog as he mows the final rows.

 

I'm surprised nobody on this thread has mentioned Starman Justice.