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Worst Movie Sequel Ever

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by DanOregon, Mar 3, 2020.

  1. DanOregon

    DanOregon Well-Known Member

    COVID 19 pretty much sucks.
    cyclingwriter2 and Batman like this.
  2. swingline

    swingline Well-Known Member

    Worse than Christensen? That dude makes Kaw-Liga look animated by comparison.
  3. 3_Octave_Fart

    3_Octave_Fart Well-Known Member

    I think Christensen was making an effort.
    He seems to be a well-meaning goober who likes making bad movies and fighting HIV in Africa.
    You can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit and nor can any actor, thespian or no, make it work with lines like "But I'm trying, Master."
  4. Baron Scicluna

    Baron Scicluna Well-Known Member

    Jar Jar Binks sucked so bad, the NCAA put Cleveland State back on probation.
  5. DanOregon

    DanOregon Well-Known Member

    Well, this isn't the worst idea of a movie sequel. I'm really surprised there hasn't been a sequel to The Big Chill. The cast is still around and would probably do it for scale and back-end profits.
  6. micropolitan guy

    micropolitan guy Well-Known Member

    JoBeth Williams and Berringer could get married, since JoBeth's movie husband has died. I think everyone else is still alive; William Hurt just looks dead.
  7. 3_Octave_Fart

    3_Octave_Fart Well-Known Member

    I think that's a great idea.
  8. Starman

    Starman Well-Known Member

    Zombie Alex (Kevin Costner) could come hunt them down.

    Then all the Michigan alums could sit around and bitch at Harbaugh on the teevee.
  9. Tweener

    Tweener Well-Known Member

    “Touch me, I’ll sue!”
    RonClements and Batman like this.
  10. DanOregon

    DanOregon Well-Known Member

    No doubt JoBeth and Berringer would be the Trumpers in the group. Hurt would be a male Marianne Williamson. Goldblum would have created a string of really bad sitcoms and dramedies that none of his friends ever watches. Kline and Close would have conciously uncoupled - and Kline and Mary Kay Place would both be married to people 20 years younger than themselves. I'm thinking Close would have discovered she's gay and has a partner. The real question would be whether any of them would have a non-white friend.
  11. micropolitan guy

    micropolitan guy Well-Known Member

    And Kline and Place's love child would be a community organizer someplace with a nice trust fund from Kline's shoe business.
  12. DanOregon

    DanOregon Well-Known Member

    Place was the shoe exec. And the rest of the crowd would grill her for all the child labor abuses. The love child would be the key protagonist though - constantly ripping his or her parents for how self-absorbed they were.
    "Yeah you protested the war. Funny how the protests stopped as soon as they ended the draft."
    "You worked your way through Michigan? You got in with a 2.8 GPA? You left with no debt? Wow, that's amazing!"
    "It's nice that you like Motown, but why don't you all have any friends who aren't white? How could you stand to live in South Carolina?"
    "So Medicare is great for you, but not everyone else?
    "I really think it's great you're still working - because you want to, not because you need to - a lot of my friends are stuck behind several people of your generation, and we're still renting because we can't afford to buy. But you do you!"
    "You talk about Alex like his suicide was a tragedy - the real tragedy is how you all continue to talk about the past and how great it was, not what you're doing to make the present a better place. Maybe it's because you can't."
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