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Worst internet advice you followed

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Spartan Squad, Jul 11, 2017.

  1. Spartan Squad

    Spartan Squad Well-Known Member

    As a bit of background for the query, my wife and I have two cats who are as thick headed as cats come. We left on vacation for a week at the end of June. In the week-plus since we've returned, one of our two cats has taken up a cat box strike. We had hoped he'd get over it after a few days of returning to a normal routine of his cat box being cleaned and us being home. Instead, the strike continues. Each morning (and often after lunch) one of us must clean up a steaming pile of crap before we can have a steaming cup of coffee.

    My wife decided to look online for advice and came across a thing that said cats hate aluminum foil. It claimed if you place it down in the area where they are having accidents, it will compel them to move on, preferably back to their cat box. So she put foil down last night. Not only does my cat not hate foil, he left us a giant deuce on the foil for our trouble.

    So that got me wondering, who else has followed seemingly good internet advice only to have it not work at all or go horribly wrong?
  2. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

    I once read online about dealing with chronic ingrown toenails by using 24 cheap domestic beers, a Ginsu knife and a lighter.
  3. Batman

    Batman Well-Known Member

    On the bright side, at least you can just gather up the foil instead of picking up cat turds by hand and having to clean the floor.
  4. Spartan Squad

    Spartan Squad Well-Known Member

    My usual routine is to get pissed at the cat and then get more pissed that my cat doesn't comprehend or doesn't care that I'm livid. When my wife said he went on the foil, I just had to laugh. It was the perfect dick move and it was easy to deal with.
    Vombatus and Batman like this.
  5. Batman

    Batman Well-Known Member

    Yeah, I do love the way cats seem to figure you out and do the most dickish thing possible to let you know they ain't having it. If we're in bed and our cat wants out or to be fed, it has learned to knock things off the night stand -- slowly, and one at a time -- until we wake up and tend to her needs. Sometimes I'll be awake and watching her and she'll stare at me while she does it.
    I can picture your cat thinking to himself, "Foil? FOIL!? Awwww, hell no. I'll show them what I think of foil."
    Spartan Squad likes this.
  6. CD Boogie

    CD Boogie Well-Known Member

    I used a spray bottle filled with mouthwash that was slightly watered down to stop my asshole cat from peeing in certain places. Worked like a charm and the smell is refreshingly minty, too. (That gradually goes away, but the little fucker probably won't piss or shit there anymore.)
  7. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

    SFIND and Spartan Squad like this.
  8. MTM

    MTM Well-Known Member

    The perfect dick move would have been to crap just off the edge of the foil so you'd still have to pick it off the floor, but still kudos to kitty.
  9. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

    I think you might have gotten the advice wrong.
    Cats love aluminum foil. It's plastic wrap they hate.
    Try it again.
    cjericho likes this.
  10. Chef2

    Chef2 Well-Known Member

    "You gotta check out this site called SportsJournalists.com"
  11. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

    Worst advice you've ever gotten, virtual or otherwise, was to wear open-toed shoes more often.
  12. MisterCreosote

    MisterCreosote Well-Known Member

    "You should try 'couples' counseling.' "
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