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Where are the damn race results!?

Discussion in 'Journalism topics only' started by Evil ... Thy name is Orville Redenbacher!!, Jul 31, 2006.

  1. First thing this morning the phone rings.
    Caller: I subscribe to your paper but I'll be damned if I know why. Ain't nothing I want to read ever in the Mother F$&%er!
    Maybe you could tell me where in the hell I might be able to find out who in the hell won yesterday's race?
    Me: (Normally, the first cuss word uttered at me gains the caller an immediate hang up. But today, I sensed a golden opportunity.) Sir, what race are referring to? We had the IRL results in this morning's paper?
    Caller: I don't give a shit about that crap. I'm talking about the NASCAR race. I'm a devoted fan, but I can't find out nothing about it in that rag ya'll call a paper.
    Me (Beginning to grin): Sir, there was no NASCAR race yesterday. It was their off week.
    Callers: (Blink, blink) Oh. Uh, well.... (silence)
    Me: Did you want to apologize now or later?
    Caller: Fuck you. (Hangs up)

    I love Mondays.
  2. Precious Roy

    Precious Roy Active Member

    Great story.... Wish that wouls happen to me today
  3. fmrsped

    fmrsped Active Member

    At a previous stop, I swear we had people call the SECOND the race was over and ask who won. Like, almost asking to see if we watched or something.

    I didn't get how they didn't know who won the race, but sensed the race was over and had to call in. Very weird.

    On a related note, I also loved the callers who would call during the week and say, "I'm a huge (BIG SCHOOL) fan and I was wondering how they did Saturday."

    Sir, if you're a big fan, why are you asking four days later?
  4. nietsroob17

    nietsroob17 Well-Known Member

    Like clockwork, I usually have the same guy (sounds a little "slow") call us --- even the direct sport editor's extension --- wondering who won the race.

    During the College World Series, this one guy (who sounded like he was off the cast of "The Ringer") wanting to know how Rice was doing. And we're in Georgia!

    And the topper, couple weeks ago after we had finished all our coverage of high school spring football, this guy who sounded exactly like the character from "Family Guy" who always tries to seduce Chris called wondering when we were going to cover one of the schools -- a school which is only mediocre, if that, in football
  5. Batman

    Batman Well-Known Member

    We get the calls from the "slow" guy too. Always wants to know when one of our local high schools is playing football -- even in July -- then when we tell him the date of their first game he says, "I know. I have the schedule." Even though I know it's coming, it still drives me nuts. Especially when he does it 15 minutes before deadline.
  6. joe_schmoe

    joe_schmoe Active Member

    They be everywhere.
    Had one guy who called asking for results from his alma mater in hoops. An NAIA school about 7 states over. We have enough trouble rounding up the results from all of our NCAA in-state schools.
    My favorites are the ones who say "I read the paper, even checked your website." for XXXXX results. Okay you have the web, go the XXXX's school/conference site.....the same freakin site I have to go to track these results for you because you apparently can't figure out there's more than one webpage out there.
  7. Barsuk

    Barsuk Active Member

    That's strange, because when he calls me he wants to know what channel a sporting event will air on. Not which NETWORK, mind you, but which CHANNEL. I have to pull up his cable provider's lineup to get this info for him.

    Unfortunately, he'll probably forget to watch it, then have to call back to find out who won.

  8. bydesign77

    bydesign77 Active Member

    I think this is a good thing that he only wants to check your site.

    somehow ...
  9. Farbecker

    Farbecker Active Member

    Our guy always calls on Wednesday to ask us about that week's NASCAR races -- when, where and what channel -- despite the fact that we have a NASCAR page each week and nothing is happening for several more days.
  10. TheHacker

    TheHacker Member

    Love the angry NASCAR calls. I got one once from a guy who called the sports department and said he wanted to cancel his subscription because "y'all show favortism toward certain NASCAR drivers. All y'all ever write about is Jeff Gordon. Y'all ain't written nothin' bout Earnhardt!"

    Mind you, this was my first fulltime job at a 12,000 circ. in the middle of nowhere. So the only "writing" we ever did about NASCAR was whatever we got from our "staffer" Mike Harris -- you know, he'd do a little slumming with us on the side whenever the AP didn't have him booked.
  11. JBHawkEye

    JBHawkEye Well-Known Member

    My favorite NASCAR fan call was the guy who called and said the writers we use _ Harris, Fryer and Ed Hinton _ don't know anything about the sport. His words: "They don't know shit."

    Which nearly prompted me to say, "So, you know shit?"
  12. shotglass

    shotglass Guest

    I love trying to keep this kind of fucktard on the line long enough to try to explain the Mike Harris situation -- like, none of us have ever met the guy -- and see if he gets humble, or if he just sputters.
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