When to stiff the waitress

definitely.
think of your own work experiences when you've received some kind of "punishment" - shitty assignment, whatever - without being informed why
it's not easy, but leaving a penny or some such is as bad as the service itself
say something to the manager like - "Look, just want you to know I didn't leave a tip for my waiter/waitress because ...
you might even end up getting a free meal

 

I have made it a point, when dining with one couple in my life, to find the waitress before hand, tip her and tell her this is going to make up for the couple who insists on paying the bill. I always get great service from the waitress.

 

I generally start at 20 percent and go up or down, depending. I'm a pretty easy diner, glass of water, no lemon, and an entree. The end.

But it does stun me when the water glass goes empty, and I have to wait for the ice to melt to get to drink anything again.

 

Question for you, Batman.

Since the restaurant was virtually empty and the waitress was within eyesight during most of your visit, what was she doing besides not stopping by your table to check on you?

After 10-15 minutes I might have done something to get her attention . . . wave your arms, throw a salt shaker at her . . . and when you got her attention you might have in a firm but respectful way been able to get the message across to her: You're not doing a very good job, so snap to it.

Just a thought.

 

You could always just shit in a napkin and leave it. Now THAT would make a statement.

 

I think if you're unhappy with the service, speak to the manager but leaving the server a penny or something similar is bush-league.

Problem is that tips in a lot North American restaurants aren't pooled as they are in Europe (and most high end restaurants in N America. That is a much more equitable system, recognizing that the server is only one part of the operation.

So if you don't tip the server because the food is crappy, most of the time you're punishing someone for something she/ he has no control over.

 

Or on the table .. whatever is more convinient.

 

I've never done any of that.

And a waiter/waitress really has to fuck up before I'll stiff him/her. But I will if it's warranted.

 

It was hard to tell. The top of the booths were tall, but I could see the top of her head in one a few booths up. Maybe she was doing paperwork or setting up placements. She went in and out of the kitchen a couple times and to the parking lot at least once. Point is, she was close enough to see but not quite close enough to grab her attention. After a while, it kind of became a game -- see how long it'd take her to realize she had a customer sitting there. I wasn't an asshole to her at any point in time and figured out what I wanted between the time she took the drink order and brought it to the table. Not high maintenance at all.
Besides, her JOB is to check on me. If she can't remember to do that every 10 minutes or so, especially when the place is empty, she's not doing it very well. Like someone else said, if your income is dependent on tips, you'd better do something to actually earn them. I didn't feel bad in the least about not tipping. The only thing I wish I had done was write something like "horrible service" on the check.

My tipping philosophy is like ijag. Start around 20 percent, go a little higher for better service or a little lower for bad service. Fuck the automatic tip shit. I'm not a needy diner. Bring me my food hot, my drink cold and stop and see if I need a refill a few times. That's all I ask. If you get the order right, the rest isn't rocket science. If you can't do it, get a tin cup and sunglasses and beg for change on the street.

Oh, and you get bonus points if you stop and offer a refill AFTER I've paid the check. Nothing pisses me off more than paying the check and becoming dead to them.

 

What I love is the person who complains about the steak he claims is overcooked after he's eaten 3/4 of it.

Or the guy who sends back the wine to impress his girlfriend.

But on the other hand I HATE those "Hi, I'm Gord and I'm your server tonight"

Almost as bad as greeters at Wal-Mart.

 

As as side note to this whole thing, one of the most impressive feats of waitering I've ever encountered was at Commander's Palace in New Orleans (very upscale restaurant). Batgirl and I were having lunch, and my water glass got down to about half full. They have teams of waiters there, and the watergirl saw the glass from down the hall -- I swear, she was 25-30 feet away with at least one table between her and us -- and immediately picked up the pitcher, walked over and refilled it.
That helped earn the staff a rather nice tip that afternoon, and to this day I wish I would've left a little more.

 

No prob.....