What's the stupidist thing anyone's ever said to you? (Non-work version)

While waiting for the bus, "Did the bus come yet?"

 

You two know how to ruin a good thread.

 

pre-made dough

 

Power outage at my apartment complex over the summer. People across the street (mouth breathers I think) come out and ask me what's going on. I tell them the power is out. They don't know I work for the paper. They ask me if I called the power company and I tell them no. Then they ask me if I know when the power is coming back on.

One of these same idiots angrily took a parking ticket to the apartment complex office, thinking they'd pay it or something. The street in front is public, and the cops ticket and tow after a snow emergency so the plows can come through. I'm pretty sure the person lives off disability or lottery winnings, because he/she (I can't tell) spends most of the day and evening smoking out in front of the building.

 

When I ran the Domino's in Delaware, we would ask people who came in for carry-outs if they wanted their pizzas cut into six or eight slices.

One time a family came in, mom, dad and kids, and I asked the question. "Six," the mom said. "I don't think we can eat eight." I stood there, thinking she was delivering a joke. Her husband turned and looked at her. Her kids looked at her. Then started laughing uncontrollably. As did we, once they left.

 

Maybe she was related to Yogi Berra.

 

"We are out of chicken, we apologize for the inconvenience" -- sign out in front of a local KFC. Question, if you are out of chicken at KFC, or in txsportscribe's case out of hamburger patties, why don't you just close?

 

During a power outage my sister-in-law wasn't flushing her toilet because she thought it wouldn't flush without power.

A former coworker had a knack for loudly saying ridiculously dumb things. Two that spring to mind: He didn't consider Interstate 90 a major freeway, and once asked if there were mountains in Montana.

 

High school lit class, circa 1999. We were reading Jules Verne and H.G. Wells and talking about how they were ahead of the time with their fantastical tales of flying machines and going to the moon.

I swear, a girl who was practically a Rhodes Scholar looked to the teacher and said, "We haven't been to the moon."

Book smart with no common sense.

 

That reminds me of one in high school. We were in an honors class working on a debate unit. The topic was euthanasia, and after we'd been discussing it for a few minutes one of the smartest girls in the class raised her hand and said, "I don't get what this has to do with youth in Asia." She was dead serious.

 

Because they make more money staying open, even in those cases.

 

Ah, high school. Breeding ground of the stupid comment.

In a freshman health class, we were covering first aid. Had just covered how to stop a major arterial bleed, and moved on. Somehow, we ended up on head lacerations. Teacher asked "how would you stop the bleeding?" One idiot - after 20 years I still remember her name, Hanan Sabri - chipped in immediately: "A tourniquet!"

Poor sod has a head wound and there would be Hanan, strangling the fucker to death.

Also, another girl's mother worked as a cashier in the cafeteria. Overheard her begging to Mom one lunchtime in order to go to some school sporting event that night: "But, Mom, I want to be an athletic supporter!"

And a couple from longtime poster JustASID (how he's not posted these already, I dunno, other than he's pretty busy with basketball season):

One of JaSID's assistants once asked when Cinco de Mayo was. (facepalm)

Another one of JaSID's former co-workers famously drove up to the McDonald's drive-thru and proceeded to order "a Quarter Pounder with Cheese... NO CHEESE."