What makes a good lede?

Unless you work for Foxsports.com. One of their columnists always starts ledes with questions. It makes me want to call Foxsports.com and complain.

 

Not my favorite lede of all-time but the phrase "sniffling sad sacks" is golden.

 

You know, I did what I do not like.

Last night, yesterday or tomorrow drive me crazy. Just type the day it happened.

If I pick up a day or two old paper, I don't like trying to figure out in my head when the game was played.

 

Isn't AP style to use today/tonight/this morning, etc., and then whatever day for everything else? That's what our paper does, unless it's a quote or something. Figured it was pretty standard.

 

Just my personal preference.

If I look up a story online about Duke/UNC, it just drives me a little crazy always reading last night or yesterday even though the game was played weeks ago.

 

Back on the topic of using second person for a second, I also think it can work in certain cases. Forever's lede worked on some level, if for no other reason than to grab the reader by the shirt collar and raise an eyebrow. That's effective.
At the risk of another skewering, I had one a couple years ago that I thought came out well. It's from a story about a basketball player who was averaging close to 30 points a game. His dad had been a big star in this town in his day, had played in the NBA for a couple years, and his son was basically raised with a basketball in his hand. I tried to take the lede from the point of view of a guy trying to guard him, and failing miserably.
It's a little long, but it's from a three-dumper, 50-inch feature story so keep that in mind...

It's got to be the hands.
Those quick hands, those magician's hands, that make slight, almost imperceptible moves. The ones that make you think you saw something you didn't, that make you hesitate for just a split second, until you realize it might not be the hands at all.
Maybe it's the feet.
You noticed them earlier, as this tall, skinny kid named Jimmy Rottencrotch was elevating over you and shooting a jumper in your face. So you back off, and now he's using those same feet to blow past you. As you see the zero on the back of his jersey fling itself into three of your teammates, though, you realize something else -- it's not just the physical gifts. The guy's got heart.
And as the referee's whistle echoes in your ears, you see him high-fiving his teammates and strolling to the foul line to add another point to his total, it all comes together. You haven't just been outplayed, you've been outsmarted. You and your teammates have done everything he's wanted you to, been at his mercy this whole time.
So you shrug your shoulders, manage an admiring smile and trudge back down the court. Trying to guard this guy is impossible, you think, but there's always hope. Maybe next time he'll make a mistake or miss.
But he doesn't.

 

I'd back off because Rottencrotch's crotch was in my face. Can't be too careful.

 

A lot of times, when you read that, it's because of a paper's style. I don't like it, either, but that's the way it goes sometimes.

 

Sorry...SECOND person doesn't work. It's terrible, terrible style.

 

When I write, I look for something I can build on. Something almost imperceptible, unless you're really paying attention. And usually that becomes my lede.

 

That lede would make a good discussion group topic. I know lots of people (and lots of readers) who would think that was pretty cool way to start a story. At the same time, I can imagine lots of veteran editors/copy guys cringing.

Am I wrong to label that a younger generation type of lede? I don't know. No need to answer the question Batman, but would I be correct in guessing you're under 30?

Maybe I'm totally off base here and just ignore me. But the bottom line is, "Would the reader like this and keep reading?" I think probably yeah they would.

Here’s another question: Could you rewrite that lede without using the second person?

 

The whole lede is a story he made up in his mind.
Batman...Are you the guy in the story that gets burned??? Probably not.
Batman....Did you talk to a player that has experienced getting burned?? Probably not.
My guess is you watched this kid make some good plays and you imagined what defenders were thinking.

You write ---"Maybe next time he'll make a mistake or miss.
But he doesn't."

Really??? the guy never misses.

Batman..I'm not trying to dog on you..I like your other ledes on the other posts. I just hate Second person.