What did I miss?

I've had my head up the ass of our football tab for the past week, so haven't been on SportsJournalists.com in days.

What did I miss?

 

The ring around Uranus moved.

 

You can bid on Jenna Jameson's implants on eBay.

And Van Halen cancelled their planned tour, reunited, disbanded, reunited again, disbanded again and then decided to focus all their energies on making Michael Anthony's life a living hell.

 

IJAG has never seen The Wizard of Oz.

 

Bill Murray got busted for driving a golf cart under the influence in Stockholm.

Now we need Carl Spackler to weigh in on this one.

NOONAN!

 

AQB still wants the fucking asshole Cubs to score some fucking runs.

 

Ace doesn't work at the Plain Dealer

 

We all said RIP to the fetuses in a jar.

 

Old Tony and Yawn are campaigning for Hillary.

FB has a new gig on Fox News.

Hondo has converted to Islam.

Beef is moving to Toronto.

Flash is dating Al Strachan.

 

And the Leafs won the Stanley Cup?

 

Dude, we hd him right up to there.

 

Mitch Albom still hasn't met those guys in St. Louis.