Well, thank goodness. He had started to let himself go

This headline is a keeper. I wonder how long it will take CITY TV to fix it:


Pope John Paul II To Be Beautified May 1

http://www.citytv.com/toronto/citynews/news/international/article/107954--pope-john-paul-ii-to-be-beautified-may-1

Well, by the time I posted this, they had fixed it. Damn. One for the ages.

 

When I was a kid, I used to think canonized meant getting shot out of a cannon.

 

That would be awesome.

 

When I was a kid and my dad would go to work, I would beg him to stay home and play with me. He, of course, would tell me he had to go to work or he'd be fired. I always pictured him staying home from work while the fire department had to come put out the blaze in his office.

 

When I was in second or third grade, our teacher told us it was time to take a lavatory break. I walked down the hall to the laboratory and couldn't figure out why no one else was there, and why she wanted us to pee in there.

 

As a kid, I thought a cease fire was an actual fire set to mark the end of a battle.

 

Similarly, my dad always told me he had to leave to go make money, which I took too literally.

 

Glad to see a Pope, who was known for holding his flock to strict interpretations of the rules, is being fast-tracked to sainthood in a clear flaunting of said rules.

Hypocrisy, thy name is the Roman Catholic Church.

 

Yeah, especially the firing the pope's dead body out of a cannon. Would he be wearing those red slippers that they put on him during the visitation?

 

Wasn't Hunter S. Thompson canonized?

 

The five-year wait was waived for Mother Theresa as well.
It is done from time to time.

Also, he could be beatified without ever being canonized.