Weirdest Song Title

Eat That Rat -- Ramones

Carouselambra -- Zeppelin

 

don't know if this qualifies as weird or not..
musta notta gotta lotta - Joe Ely

 

Indeed it is. Released off Hooray For Boobies in 2000.

The lyrics, spoken/sung in an old-stlye Western pace ...

"A Lap Dance Is So Much Better When the Stripper is Crying"

I was lonelier than Kunta Kinte at a Merle Haggard concert
That night I strolled on into Uncle Limpy's Hump Palace lookin' for love.
It had been a while.
In fact, three hundred and sixty-five had come and went
since that midnight run haulin' hog to Shakey Town on I-10.
I had picked up this hitchhiker that was sweatin' gallons
through a pair of Daisy Duke cut-offs and one of those Fruit Of The Loom tank-tops.
Well, that night I lost myself to ruby red lips,
milky white skin and baby blue eyes.
Name was Russell.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Well, faster than you can say, "shallow grave",
this pretty little thing come up to me and starts kneadin' my balls
like hard-boiled eggs in a tube sock.
Said her name was Bambi and I said, "Well that's a coincidence darlin',
'cause I was just thinkin' about skinnin' you like a deer."
Well she smiled, had about as much teeth as a Jack-O-Lantern,
and I went on to tell her how I would wear her face like a mask
as I do my little kooky dance.
And then she told me to shush.
I guess she could sense my desperation.
'Course, it's hard to hide a hard-on when you're dressed like Minnie Pearl.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

So, Bambi's goin' on about how she can make all my fantasies come true.
So I says, "Even this one I have where Jesus Christ
is jackhammering Mickey Mouse in the doo-doo hole
with a lawn dart as Garth Brooks gives birth to something
resembling a cheddar cheese log with almonds on Santa Claus's tummy-tum?"
Well, ten beers, twenty minutes and thirty dollars later
I'm parkin' the beef bus in tuna town if you know what I mean.
Got to nail her back at her trailer.
Heh. That rhymes.
I have to admit it was even more of a turn-on
when I found out she was doin' me to buy baby formula.

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

Day or so had passed when I popped the clutch,
gave the tranny a spin and slid on into
The Stinky Pinky Gulp N' Guzzle Big Rig Snooze-A-Stop.
There I was browsin' through the latest issue of "Throb",
when I saw Bambi starin' at me from the back of a milk carton.
Well, my heart just dropped.
So, I decided to do what any good Christian would.
You can not imagine how difficult it is to hold a half gallon of moo juice
and polish the one-eyed gopher when your doin' seventy-five
in an eighteen-wheeler.
I never thought missing children could be so sexy.
Did I say that out loud?

Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'
Well I find it's quite a thrill
When she grinds me against her will
Yes, a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is cryin'

 

Spinal Meningitis, Bananas and Blow -- Ween

 

Frank Zappa -- Prelude to The Afternoon of a Sexually Aroused Gas Mask.

 

I am laughing my ass off right now in my office and my coworkers are enjoying this one. Was this a number one hit? I am thinking no...

 

The Butthole Surfers have had some cool song titles.

Negro Observer, Lady Sniff, Sweat Loaf.

Jesus at McDonald's from Mojo Nixon always made me laugh.

 

Drop Kick Me Jesus Through the Goal Posts of Life...



Something you should know about Drop Kick Me, Jesus Lyrics

Title: Bobby Bare - Drop Kick Me, Jesus lyrics

Artist: Bobby Bare

Visitors: 1405 visitors have hited Drop Kick Me, Jesus Lyrics since Feb 12, 2007.

Print: Bobby Bare - Drop Kick Me, Jesus Lyrics print version

Drop Kick Me, Jesus

(Chorus)
Drop kick me, Jesus through the goal posts of life
End over end, neither left nor to right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Drop kick me, Jesus through the goal posts of life

Make me, oh make me, Lord more than I am
Make me a piece in your master game plan
Free from the earthly temptations below
I’ve got the will, Lord if you’ve got the toe

(Chorus)

Bring on the brothers who’ve gone on before
And all of the sisters who’ve knocked on your door
All the departed dear loved ones of mine
Stick them up front in the offensive line

(Chorus 2x)

Oh, drop kick me, Jesus through the goal posts of life

 

Not a chance. The Bloodhound Gang released "The Bad Touch" and "Mope" to the airwaves and made videos for those songs and "The Ballad of Chasey Lain" (yes, that Chasey Lain). You can YouTube all of them. The Gang's videos are all pretty funny, but I'll warn that the one for "Chasey Lain" is probably not something you want to whip out at the office -- pun intended.

 

Other gems from the Bloodhound Gang:

Diarrhea Runs In The Family, Farting With A Walkman On, The Evils Of Placenta Hustling, You're Pretty When I'm Drunk, Kiss Me Where It Smells Funny, Lift Your Head Up High (And Blow Your Brains Out) and Yawn's favorite song, I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks.

 

Ray Stevens'
Ned Nostril and the Southseas Paradise, Put Your Blues on Ice, Keep It Twice The Price Band (icky, icky, ucky, ucky).

 

I nominate any song written by Anal pussycat. They're a twisted band with an awful sound. But the titles are funny, as long as you've got a very liberal sense of humor -- and don't take them seriously.

Here's a few:

Beating Up Hippies for Their Drugs at a Phish Concert
You Were Too Ugly to Rape, So I Just Beat the Shit out of You
You Look Divorced
I Became A Rape Counselor So I Could Tell Rape Victims They asked For It
I Sent Concentration Camp Footage To America's Funniest Home Videos
I Got An Office Job For The Sole Purpose Of Sexually Harassing Women
I Sold Your Dog To A Chinese Restaurant

And that's only a few.