Virgin tales — Chapter 1

Too bad Jay can't say the same about his lady friend.

 

Hey, she's got a dog that touches his balls. That'll have to be enough.

 

And cupcakes. A good cupcake can make up for a lot of things, Booger.

 

Cupcakes? A man that cleans up after himself?

Dammit, if I had known Jay was out there, I might have tried to stay a virgin longer.

 

But she is less likely to notice than a woman who isn't a virgin.

"Oh, don't mind that. They all look that way"

 

So, apparently I'm the only one who thinks it's completely fucked up he already has a key? Really?

P.O. in his appartment with his ex-girlfriend of 1 1/2 years:
(Girl gets up)
P.O.: Where are you goin?
Girl: In here.
P.O.: Where's "here?"
Girl: The kitchen.
P.O.: For what?
Girl: Snack.
P.O.: Why?
Girl: I'm hungry.
P.O.: You just fucking ate...actually, you ate like a quarter of your meal, then said you were full. You didn't even put in on it, either.
Girl: I was full.
P.O.: Now where are you going?
Girl: Bathroom.
P.O.: What for? You went at the restaurant.
Girl: I have to go again.
P.O.: Yeah, sure you do.

 

Oh, there's nothing about the entire saga that isn't fucked up.

 

This is the biggest bunch of bullshit on the thread.

There's no fucking way you ever had a girlfriend.

 

Was she refunding?

 

Apparently you missed the "Gone Baby Gone" thread, you idot.

And mikey, I have no idea what that means.

 

Was she tossing the dinner you bought her?