Trouble with a nephew

It's probably a good idea to let little things like this go for now.

For karma's sake.

 

I don't like kids. It's not a secret. My friend has three, ages 6 and under. I love them all...for about 20 minutes. I call her, and I can make it until they start screaming in the background, and then I'm like "Um, yeah, I'll let you go."

I can't take kids. But I don't think that makes her a bad parent. Just means I don't like kids.

 

So to review, he did nothing wrong. He had every reason to assume the gift was for him, if his mom told him it was not for him and did not open the package, it would have just made things worse and as for my cousin's kid, I guess it's a case of if you snooze, you lose?

 

He is two years old. He is completely incapable of understanding right from wrong. He is impulsive. He is self-centered. He is a standard two year old.

And I know it doesn't seem fair, but no parent is going to take parenting advice from someone who is not a parent. I know that seems wrong, because it's kind of like fanbois saying that sports writers can't critique sports unless they "played the game," but life's not fair. And in this case, until you have had to deal with your own 2-year-old, it's tough to understand what it's like to have to deal with one, 24 hours a day.

 

As a mom, I would have told my kid to "Give the present to Cousin." Maybe there would have been a tantrum that forced me to leave the room or the house, maybe not. Never can tell. But I would also try to distract him with something else. A snack, my keys, a toy we brought from home.

If my kid kept making a beeline for a TV or cable box, I would park myself in front of it and block his way.

As a mom, I would be very hurt if we were at a gathering and you gave every kid but mine a gift, whether he was old enough to notice or not.

 

"if you don't have kids, you wouldn't understand" drove me *nuts*.

Until I had a kid. Then I catch myself saying it all the time.

 

See, that's just not true in some cases. Some of us who don't have kids do understand.

And for that very reason, we don't have kids.

I'm around the gremlin-like creatures enough to know they are too much for me to ever handle. I can barely keep my own life in line. I can't imagine trying to live with one every moment for the next 18 years.

 

Going to scar that kid for life, I'm sure.

Not to criticize your gift-choosing skills, but one of the worst things about birthdays is all the extra shit that ends up around the house that we don't want or need. I'd be happy as hell if cousins, friends and everyone else just surreptitiously stole something every time they came over. The house would suddenly become manageable.

As for the initial question, you said sister-in-law. Brother's wife, or wife's sister? In either case you're going to put your loved one in the middle of a silly argument because, odd as it might seem to you, mothers of 2-year-olds don't tend to react to unsolicited advice with a "Gee, thanks for pointing that out!" If it's your brother's wife, he's going to have no choice but to side with her, and you lose.

 

Wait until the kid is about 17, show up at his prom, shit in his date's lap. Say "that was for taking that cellphone 15 years ago at the party, fucker." Walk out.

 

Don't get him a Christmas present. It will send a message to the parents.

 

Go to their house and take one of the kid's gifts from under the tree and open it.

 

Announce that Santa Claus isn't real just as gift-opening begins.