To refill or not to refill ...

It's a long and distinguished list, Mikey, but THAT'S the saddest post you've made on this thread.

 

Back to the original topic...at a movie theater, above all other places, get your money's worth.

A #2 combo or whatever (big popcorn, couple drinks) costs damn near as much as the tickets. I'll always refill the popcorn and have it in the house for a snack the next night.

When I was working part-time at a paper between years of college, I'd often come home and my mom or sister would have gotten a refill on the popcorn and left it in the microwave for me. Really, there were few things better in my (at the time) pathetic life to walk in the door at 12:30 a.m. and find an enormous bag of free theater popcorn.

 

I think being a writer has something to do with it -- the weird hours, eating when you've got the time, almost exclusively out. Not to mention the low pay, where you've got to think, "How can I possibly make more out of this, stretch every dollar to its max." Then, of course, I'm a pack rat, which doesn't help matters.

My ex-girlfriend helped me move into my last two places. The first time, I opened the U-Haul, and dozens of good, empty boxes fell out. I knew I had a dumpster in my new place -- I didn't at the old one -- but a part of me wanted to save them for my next move. She told me if she found any empty boxes during my next move, she was leaving immediately.

On my next move, she lamented on the fact that I threw more away after we unloaded the truck than I did when I loaded it. We took about three grocery bags -- I save all them and don't buy regular garbage bags -- of garbage out after arranging the new place.

 

Success?

 

I want a Mikey reality show.

 

Me too. I'm sure there's a hole somewhere in ABC Family's lineup.

 

I can see dream sequences where he thinks he's Jesse in Full House -- or perhaps one of the Olson twins.

 

Maybe you could buy some stories from Kramer. Like the one about returning the pants you were wearing.

 

Kevin: Hello?
Mikey: Kev-Man!
Kevin: Hey Rainman. What's up?
Mikey: Remember when me and you lived at that apartment just off 4th street sophomore year?
Kevin: Yeah.
Mikey: Was that the place where I tried to cook a trout in the dishwasher?
Kevin: Sigh. That was a Home Improvement episode.
Mikey: Oh. .... That's right. Were we living at that apartment around the time when I let a guy drive my car and we couldn't get rid of the smell of his body odor? Man, that stunk. Smelled like rotten asscrack. I had to just give the car up.
Kevin: Sigh. That was a Seinfeld episode.
Mikey: But that was definitely the place where I found a snake in the attic and you and Smitty wouldn't believe me and then you freaked out and the landlord called the exterminator and he couldn't believe all the stuff in the attic. Man, that was freaky.
Kevin: Seriously dude. That was a Cosby show episode. I've seen it like six times.
Mikey: Well....what stuff did happen?
Kevin: NOTHING happened. You just sat in front of the TV all day. Unless you were making a Taco Bell run and bringing back forks and sporks and shit.
Mikey: I must have done something.
Kevin: Other than washing your plastic forks? Dude, those things are plastic for a reason. And when you weren't watching TV, you were writing to the networks, asking for a crossover episode where Tim Taylor tries to help Lowell fix an airplane on Wings. We tried to take you to a frat party once, but you punched that girl in the face when she said that The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air was stupid. Well, first you tried to engage her in a dialogue about how The Fresh Prince is a metaphor for rescuing the young, black male from a dissociative life of crime, but when she wrinkled her nose at you and said you smell and so does the Fresh Prince, you popped her in the nose. Now that was some funny shit.
Mikey: OK then, I'll talk to ya later man.

 

The next time you pay $5 for a bucket of popcorn or $2.50 for a diet soda, remember this thread!
All the mark up in price is for those of you cheapskates!

 

Does anybody else save fast food drink cups in their car, and then sneak them into the same fast food places to get free refills? Fuck you combo! I'm just getting the sandwich. Ha ha!

 

One of the funniest things anyone's ever posted here.

And, sadly, probably 97% of it really happened.