This Bill Simmons column was brought to you by Sore Winners Inc.

The highly entertaining part is pretty subjective, but that was kinda my point with the Alba comment. Whatever you think of him, Cook is doing pretty well for himself.

 

Wait, I think I've heard of Cook. Is he uber-political and shit like that?

 

Yes, making fun of Bill Simmons and Dane Cook and pretending you don't know who they are is so cool. You are hipsters and IN!

Now I will go make fun of Soulja Boy while every kid around me does his dance.

 

Who is Soula Boy?

 

Kellen Winslow?

 

No, no, no. Dane Cook is that guy who dresses in drag and does celebrity interviews in England.

[img height=275 width=200]http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2007/10/11/dameedna_narrowweb__300x472,0.jpg[/img]

 

Oh, then never heard of him.

 

Oh Soulja boy, Heard of him.

He sucks.

Next.

 

The show and the comic.
Never worked for me.

 

Colts.
Pats are the Free French, Tom Brady is Humphrey Bogart and Bill Belicheck is Claude Rains.

 

I am shocked, SHOCKED to learn there is videotaping going on in this place.

 

You know, I'd been for years wanting an NFL team to go undefeated and end that Miami thing, and I enjoy watching the Pats and probably would be on their bandwagon if it were not for guys like Simmons and the so often insufferable Beantown fan base. Can you imagine how unbearably obnoxious Simmons and followers will be if the Pats go unbeaten. Lord help us.