The Whole Kindergarten Redshirt Thing

I wouldn't presume to tell you what to do, but I would say not to let what others do make your decision for you.
We had this come up with our younger son, whom we sent to a private kindergaten in a neighboring, more upscale town. He is an August birthday. We were amazed when we found out how many of his classmates weren't going on to first grade -- not because they really weren't ready, but because in this extremely competitive, snooty town, they would be MORE ready after another year, would have an advantage.
We thought about it for about three seconds, then sent our kid on to school. He was ready in every way. He starts his senior year in high school next week, on track to graduate in top 10 or so in a class of 150. He just turned 17.
Socially, yeah, there are some times when he's a little youngish. But he has friends. It would have been ridiculous to hold him back a year.

Don't know what's best for your child, but the fact that so many people do this nowadays didn't mean much to me.

 

My daughter was in the same boat. Put her in kindergarten, was fine. Then she kinda proved too young for first grade, so she repeated it. Did her no harm, and now she's an honors student in college. And I'm frigging old.

 

------------------ UPDATE:

Hi folks. There was a good read in the NY Times Sunday called "Delay Kindergarten at Your Child's Peril." Even though it was written by a couple of neuroscientists, some people will still take the word of Malcolm Gladwell. The Gladwell thing will be with us forever.

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/25/opinion/sunday/dont-delay-your-kindergartners-start.html?_r=2

It was fun going back and reading this thread to see what I was thinking at the time.

If anyone's interested or going through the same thing... we did decided to go ahead and send her at age 4. So far, so good.

 

I'm sure she'll be fine, Luggy.

I started kindergarten at age 4, and look how I turned out!

 

Me too, Ace.

We're fucked, aren't we?

 

Doomed to repeat the mistakes of our parents!

 

Don't now how I missed this thread the first time around. We had a lot of debate about my daughter, who has an August b-day in a district with a September 30th cutoff. She can be a little emotionally immature at times, but she's very bright for her age. We ended up putting her in a private kindergarten and met with the teacher often to judge whether she should repeat the grade or start first grade on time.

The teacher thought she would be bored if she didn't progress to first grade and her social stills have improved a lot. She's in her thrid week of 1st grade and the teacher says that she's doing great socially, but I wonder if we are pushing her.

I skipped a grade in Junior HS and ended up starting college at 16. I would not recommend that for others because I could have used the additional maturity.

 

The discussion has moved on to starting kids early, but in reference to the original point of the thread -- parents who wait until their kids are 6 to start them in kindergarten, usually to help them compete as athletes in high school -- those parents need to be slapped upside the head and have their parenting licenses taken away.

 

Agreed.

But this discussion isn't about starting kids early. It's about starting them on time. On time-- but where they will be one of the youngest kids in the class.

I had the choice of starting her at age 4 or age 5. Age 6 wasn't an option for me.

 

I think you will find the Times article very pertinent.

 

I skipped kindergarten.

Both of my parents are what one might call "academics" and I was shoved into first grade at age 5. I was smarter than the bulk of the kids in the class, but I was also the smallest.

When I was about to enter third grade, my parents put me into some accelerated 3-4 combo class that would put me, at age 7, on the same playground as 12-year-olds. When we picked teams, it was a given I would be taken last. Academics, not an issue... Socially, my life sucked.

My parents got divorced that year and my mom moved to the other side of town. A friend suggested to my mom that I repeat third grade. My parents were incensed. "He's one of the smartest kids in his class... Why would we do that?"

My aunt finally talked them into having me repeat third grade.

I went from being the smallest kid in my class to one of the tallest. My confidence skyrocketed. It was never an academics issue, school has always come very easily for me. But socially, give your kids the extra time to grow up.

My oldest is in kindergarten right now. He loves it. Academically, he would be fine in first grade, but why would I do that to him?

My youngest was eligible to start Pre-K this year. His birthday is right at the cutoff. I said no way does he start early. We have him in a good preschool. He's learning a lot. I think an extra year will only benefit him later.

Not passing any judgment on what anyone else has done, but that's my experience on the subject...

 

My parents actually were given the option of starting me in kindergarten at age 4. My smarts were there, but they figured I'd always be the smallest, least developed, most maladjusted, etc., etc. Never necessarily resented their decision, though throughout junior and high schools my teachers would always take note of how bored I was. Though I think that was just because I was BS-averse.