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The Whole Kindergarten Redshirt Thing

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by Lugnuts, Aug 25, 2010.

  1. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

    Being developmentally ahead of other children in your class is not the same as being smarter than those kids.
    Not even remotely the same.
     
  2. swenk

    swenk Member

    I could write a book about this. And every page would say, "You won't know until it's too late."

    My two oldest kids would have been in the same grade; daughter missed the deadline by days and would have been the oldest in the class, son would have been the youngest in the class. I felt it would be unfair to have them together, so I petitioned the school to let my daughter start early, she was 4 turning 5 immediately after school started. Physically, educationally, everyone agreed she was ready to start school.

    But you just can't predict how a child will mature emotionally, and it wasn't until high school that the disparity really showed up. She was 17 when she left for college, while most of her friends had been 18 for months. It made a huge difference, and it was really rough.

    My son, also the youngest, was small for a long time, and then one day he was the tallest. Excelled at sports, despite the age/size issue. Other than lousy handwriting--immature small motor skills--it didn't matter that he was young.

    And by the way, there's a third kid who is the oldest in his class, and he's just as goofy as everyone else.

    At the end of the day, you can overthink this to death and you still won't know if you got it right. I wouldn't focus on the other kids in the area, you could move, the dates could change, there are countless variables. And when it comes to the other parents going on and on and on and on about this issue, the best thing you can do is stick your fingers in your ears and sing LALALALALALALA as loud as you can without getting thrown out of the carpool. They will make you nuts.

    If I had it to do over, I shouldn't have rushed her into school. But someone has to be the oldest, and someone has to be the youngest. You make the best informed decision you can--which is relatively impossible when you're assessing a preschooler--and work with the results.
     
  3. Roscablo

    Roscablo Well-Known Member

    I concur on this. My oldest just started kindergarten and thus my youngest has been tagging along to drop off/pick up, early school functions, etc. I bet there has been at least one mom every day who has had an opinion on my youngest's start date, which at minimum is still two years away (again, birthday the day before the cut off). Most are very firm, even if they haven't been in the situation, that we need to hold him back supported by every reason under the sun. We'll make the decision, thank you.
     
  4. Baron Scicluna

    Baron Scicluna Well-Known Member

    I have a winter birthday, and I started kindergarten when I was 5, turning 6 midway through the year. I did fine throughout school.

    But my kids, who have fall birthdays, started when they were each four, and had their fifth birthday in special ed kindergarten. We didn't think they were ready, and we had wanted our district to send our kids to preschool for another year, but the district refused.

    Our oldest ended up in pre-first before catching up, and our youngest really struggled in his first year. His teacher said that he really wasn't learning much, and we told her how we had wanted him in preschool for the extra year. She agreed, but there was nothing we could do. I just chalked up that year as, kindof an opposite redshirt year. Anything he learned, great. If not, oh well, he wasn't supposed to be there anyways.

    His second year, which should have been his first, ended up fine. His teacher (same one) said he had developed a lot more, which didn't suprise me, since I thought that should have been his kindergarten year anyways.
     
  5. outofplace

    outofplace Well-Known Member

    Exactly right. Read this and learn, hondo.

    You probably are right about private school teachers being motivated -- motivated to get a public school job.
     
  6. Moderator1

    Moderator1 Moderator Staff Member

    My wife started early AND skipped a grade. She was a high school graduate at 16 and a college graduate at 20. I think she wishes she'd waited a year (though she might have missed out on me had she done that - oh, wait, that might be another reason to wish she had a do-over).
     
  7. RickStain

    RickStain Well-Known Member

    I started college at 17 and wasn't ready. Another year may or may not have made a difference.
     
  8. 93Devil

    93Devil Well-Known Member

    Swenk, you need to stop making kids on Christmas Eve.
     
  9. Buck

    Buck Well-Known Member

    I started college at 17 and was plenty ready.
    I have an uncle who started college at 16 and says he wishes he'd gone to the high school prom. I keep telling him he didn't miss anything, but he's 82. You can't tell him anything.
     
  10. swenk

    swenk Member

    Wow. I'm Jewish, I never thought of it that way. But it explains the big guy in the red suit who kept asking if I was a good girl and telling me to sit on his lap, I always wondered who he really was.
     
  11. waterytart

    waterytart Active Member

    Luggie, if she can read (truly read, not recognize her name and a few other words), don't hold her back. She'll be bored when she starts. If she's not reading yet, holding her back will have her more in sync with her classmates, because so many of them will have been held back.

    And, yes, it is now cool to be tall.
     
  12. ADodgen

    ADodgen Member

    I started at five, but had only been five for about a month when school started. Academically ok (pretty great, even), but really poor motor skills. It took me a long time to learn to tie my shoe and I'm not sure my handwriting ever really recovered. :(
     
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