The "Up Sell"

It made sense this morning when Boom started it--then it got moved and stuff got lost and poor Sly is wondering why he ever registered here at all.

Here's the gist--You go into the bank to get some cash, they ask you if you are happy with your mortgage rate. You go into the 7-11 for coffee, they ask if you want a pastry or lottery tickets with that. You go into Sports Authority to buy socks, paying with cash, they want your address. Why do they need your address? For 'marketing opportunities.' Boom tells the clerk 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue, the clerk asks for the zip code.

Then some gremlins got into the thread and everything got weird. Still looking for the thread on The Band, if anyone finds it behind the sofa cushion or under the floor mat in the car.

 

21: I think the zip code for 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue is 20515.

 

Well, too late now, we had to go to Target for the socks.

 

Sly - I have no idea what you are talking about.

 

When I worked at Crack Barrel, we were constantly being told to increase our transaction percentage, or the percentage of transactions in which at least one retail item was purchased. Reason -- it made the retail manager look good. Didn't do a damn thing for the bottom line that matters (mine), so fuck it. As a cashier, all I can really do is sell the impulse buy items on the counter, and oddly enough, people who don't want licorice aren't going to want it any more because you asked them to buy a package while it's staring them in the face. Besides, isn't harassing the guest (never call 'em customers at the Barrel) counterproductive to enhancing guest service? You'd think.

Could be worse, though. Could be the passive-aggressive Barnes and Noble clerks asking you for your member rewards card (PROTIP: If I had a fucking member rewards card, I wouldn't need you to ask me for it because it'd already be out). Could also be the department store whores asking if you want to sign up for a 25.9% store credit card. But you get 10 percent off your first purchase! Yeah, I got your 10 percent right down here.

 

Exactly - the rewards cards are the height of annoyance. Buy a million dollars of pills with us this year and we'll give your 20 cents and a bunch of worthless coupons. We'll also sell your address to a bunch of list companies so that your are inundated with junk mail.

You hit on the word - HARRASMENT

I tell the clerks that I have no room left in my wallet but that I would be happy to wait list them if spot opens up.

 

I worked at Walgreen's once, and had to encourage people to buy crispy Butterfingers or reusable disposable cameras.

Both were an easy sell in the end, the candy bars because they were really cheap and the cameras because they seem like a good deal.

But I hate selling and was completely miserable there. The easiest upsell in the world is "Would you like fries and a drink with that?".

 

If you went to the one where I worked, believe me, you would have been sold hard. And the saddest part was we were selling picayune -- the product of the month would be something like Jelly Belly bags or Yankee Candle car fresheners, pure impluse buy shit. Even if I managed to sell something to every person who gave me their check, I don't think I'd add more than 50, 75 bucks to the bottom line.

I go to B&N enough to make a card worth my while. I just hate the indirect way they try to get you to sign up. If you're going to sell it, just sell it already. If I wanted someone to go the back door route, ***INSERT FAVORITE BOOTS JOKE HERE***

 

Agreed. I finally broke down and got the Barnes and Noble membership in Jan. and it has nearly paid for itself already. Plus, I don't have to put up with them trying to sell me one any more.

 

Worst sales gig I ever had I did for one day, and one day only. I was working part time for the local minor league team, and was stuck near the entrance gate hawking free t-shirts. The catch? They had to fill out an application for a Discover card. Most people, of course, would put down a bunch of bogus information just to get the freebie. But then I was supposed to ask to see their drivers license to verify what they wrote down. Most of them just walked away, and I can't blame them.

That job really sucked; I hate credit cards and hated these people were willing to apply for one for a lousy free shirt.