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The Sports Boy mails in another bucketload of bull$#$#

Discussion in 'Journalism topics only' started by Starman, Mar 9, 2007.

  1. Starman

    Starman Well-Known Member


    1. The "running diary" schtick is completely played out.

    3:43 a.m.: I pull my penis out, and tug it three times.
    3:44 a.m.: I tug it four more times.
    3:45 a.m. ....

    2. 94.4 percent of the national audience doesn't give a shit if the Boston Celtics ever get good again. They've had 20 years to do it; who gives a fuck if they do or not?
  2. I actually think that's where he's best. Celtics gamers aren't as funny as, say, NBA Draft, but some of his comments are pretty witty and his false sense of self-importance doesn't come through as much.

    All in all, I thought it was a fun read.
  3. Well, that got my heart started.
  4. DrRosenpenis

    DrRosenpenis Member

    Starman, you obviously don't like Simmons. Why do you keep reading him?
  5. shotglass

    shotglass Guest

    Same reason you slow down and crane your neck as you pass a car crash.

    What don't some people get about that?
  6. I gave him a chance a couple of times, but I don't read him. I just don't think he has anything interesting to say. Furthermore . . .

    I just did a word count on this column: 3,062 words. That's at least 75 column inches in a newspaper, maybe even close to 100 in some -- with art, a full page. Think of that. Would you read a newspaper column that big, by anybody?

    I don't know the guy, but it strikes me as incredibly arrogant if he thinks that people are going to hang on to his droll observations for 3,062 words. He doesn't seem to give a shit about his readers, or else the columns would be shorter.
  7. Cousin Jeffrey

    Cousin Jeffrey Active Member

    I thought that was his A material. Good stuff, fun to read on the Internet. That's what he does best.
  8. fmrsped

    fmrsped Active Member


    Starman, go back to one of your other 4,000 pet peeves, Larry Brown or Isiah Thomas or whomever.

    And please do it quietly.
  9. Mmac

    Mmac Guest

    The "running diary" is infinitely better than what he posted today--which was just a virtual verbatim cut and paste of a column he wrote a couple years ago about Holy Cross in the tourney--you can't mail it in any more than that. His running diaries can be funny (the first NBA draft diaries he did were hilarious), but they too seem to be getting worn out.
  10. MC Sports Guy

    MC Sports Guy Member

    I happen to like Simmons quite a bit. Not every one of his columns strikes a cord with me, but I can't think of any writer who does. If you don't like him, stop clicking.
  11. dooley_womack1

    dooley_womack1 Well-Known Member

    On the other hand, if you see that Starman started a thread about Simmons, and you can't take fair comment and criticism, don't click on the thread.
  12. Mighty_Wingman

    Mighty_Wingman Active Member

    In fairness -- and I'm not a big fan of Simmons' these days -- today's column wasn't "a virtual cut and paste." It was the same column, as he made entirely clear at the top.

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