The Anything Goes Grudge Board

I don't want to be at work. I want a massage from a hippie chick with a sweet smile and braless tits with big nipples.

 

I don't think the tits would look good on you...

 

Hm, looks like there was some ambiguity in the structure of that sentence. It's true; my slight frame would look beyond grotesque if adorned with man-breasts.

I'm like a gothic Hemingway in my desire for a clean, poorly-lit place. An immaculate massage therapy room with no light but the golden glow of a Moroccan lamp. And a chick with a swishy skirt.

 

I hope no one begrudges me the occasional sentence structure joke. Keeps me sane.

And there are few problems that can't be solved by a girl in a swishy skirt and no bra.

At least, it's pretty to think so.

 

Whoo-hoo!

 

Outside of cancer, name one...

 

You can throw in "Fuck you all the hell, Aflac" in there as well.

 

Fuck the fuckin' Rockies while we're at it. Oh, and Houston too.

 

Most guys would say, "You have two fuckbuddies? Fuck off, whiner."

 

Depends who the tits in question belong to.

 

Houston is a toilet.

Not saying it's bad or anything.

Just saying it's a toilet.

Oh hey, Alley, wazzup?