Stupid, stupid, STUPID! (a faux pas thread)

In 7th grade, a blind friend was showing me pictures of her boyfriend.
Someone walks up and asks, "What are you doing?"
Me: "Oh, we're just looking at pictures of her boyfriend."

D'oh. I was looking at the pictures. She ... well ... not so much. Also, it took me some time to cut out phrases like "See what I mean?" or "See there ..." . Ugh.

It still makes me cringe and it was a thousand years ago.

 

You look good for your age.

 

You're lucky.

You have one of those faces that look better heavy.

 

"So, when are you due?" *placing hand on belly*

*rubbing face where unfortunately fat woman smacks you*

 

My mom forgives you though.

 

"It's OK. Guys like fat asses now."

 

My grandma sells cakes and cookies, and one of her customers came to the door a little bigger than she looked earlier. My grandma, 79 at the time, thought the lady was pregnant and asks, "So, are you putting on some weight or do you have some news to tell me?"

"I'm putting on wait."

"Oh."

 

About a month ago, I was walking with a friend and this deaf guy was asking people for a $2 donation and handing them cards with the explanation. We were just going to walk past him, but he handed us cards. Without really breaking our stride, we apologized and each said, "I'm sorry, I don't carry cash." Then she looked at the card and started laughing. "We just told a deaf guy that we don't carry cash. We just told a deaf guy that we don't carry cash."

What a great moment in my history.

 

It's not that those jeans make your ass look fat so much as that your ass makes those jeans look fat.

 

Nice work, Mike

Going off your AIDS story, back about a year ago I worked at a place where we picked out the music over the loudspeakers. Well, we had a day where we were playing a bunch of 80s music, and inevitably, Michael Jackson came on. The girl, checking out at the time "Beat It" popped up, made the comment, "God, he's gay as AIDS."

It was possibly one of the most awkward moments of my life cause I couldn't believe someone actually just said that. Needless to say, I didn't let her check out and made her leave

 

Thanks, buddy. I'm glad my stupidity and carelessness for those around me are paying dividends now.

This didn't happen to me, but another idiot shamefully took the glory. ...

When this guy was a high school, his big, annoying-as-fuck thing was saying "Your mother" to everyone, regardless of what they said. He was working at McDonald's one night and he said it to a co-worker, and she says, "My mother's dead. ..."

I couldn't have been happier. Obviously, not for her mom dying, but that asshole vowed never to say those words again to anyone -- not in that way, at least.