Snipped!

You become a millionaire.

 

Pull out and finish in her grill.

 

that was pretty fucking inappropriate and it's not even correct. jesus christ.

 

Bite me. I bet you're not snipped.

 

well, uh, no.

 

Give me your mailing address, W-b. We'll see about that.

 

I knew that was coming. I knew that was coming and it was still so very awesome.

I've heard this, which made my buddy's wounded-in-war act when he got snipped last summer all the funnier. He kept grousing about it--never mind his wife had given birth three times in six years--and when he finally got it done he milked it as if he were the bastard son of Tiger Woods (yeah I said it!) and Derek Jeter. About 10 days after it was done, we had a fantasy football draft. He limped in there like he had no legs. Then, 10 days LATER, he showed up to another fantasy football draft AND HAD THE SAME LIMP OF DEATH.

Dude, even if it was that bad, it's still about 105 fewer weeks of hell than your wife went thru. Sack up. so to speak, of course.

 

Can you envision any scenario in which you'd have more kids?

 

If you do it, make sure the doc cauterizes the vas deferens, not just stitch it closed. I had a vasectomy after my second child was born. Got the stitch job. Three years (and one divorce) later, Baby No. 3 was conceived. To say I was shocked would be an understatement!

Here I thought the factory was shut down, but the boys were still on the job!

 

My ex was on the pill and she was OK with it.
Too bad she was a snotty beeyatch.
I need to not be drunk when I post here, BTW>

 

Fuck. No. And if Ijag makes you my secret santa this year, we're going to have words.

 

Winning the lottery.