Sluggo

A cartoon character?
John Gruden's favorite word?
What's it mean to you?

 

Boom, unless you really are a Mets fan, you know it's Don Slaught's nickname.

 

It was the nickname of a guy who used to hunt with my dad.
He was a piece of work.
Sluggo was lactose intolerant, but would drink a half-gallon of chocolate milk and eat a box of powdered donuts (did I mention he weight 250-plus?) and then have to crap. He was also (I swear) scared of the dark. So at hunting camp he would crap right outside the tent or camper.
I lost count how many times the old man, after stepping into one of Sluggo's piles, pierced the early-morning silence with a screaming stream of curse words.

Suffice to say ... Sluggo wasn't much of a hunter/outdoorsman.

He wore camo coveralls. He was so fat he wouldn't walk down hills - this is West Virginia, so ... yeah. Instead, he would sit on his fat ass and slide down to the bottom. He went through the ass-end of a pair of coveralls about every year.

And ... and ... the best part ... he shit his pants.
Regularly.
He's a man - with a wife and two kids, and pretty successful in business (chemical sales) - who shit his pants on more than one occasion!

Once we were scouting for a place to hunt. I was in the back of my dad's truck. He and Sluggo were up front. Suddenly, Dad slams on the brakes and I go flying, face-first into the rear windshield. Dad jumps out of the truck, curse words flying.
"Geez, I thought it was a fart," Sluggo said waddling out of the passenger's side.
Sluggo had been drinking milk and eating donuts when he shit his pants in my dad's truck; an old truck with a bench seat.
And in the process of cleaning himself, got shit all over the front bumper and tires. Dad GOES BALLISTIC!
There I am - 12, 13, watching my dad lose his shit; red-faced, veins bulging curse words flying - and seeing a grown man - in 30s - who just crapped his pants. I have never laughed so hard in my live. To this day, it still makes me LOL.

That's Sluggo to me.

 

He's gonna be mean to me!

OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

 

I think Evil ... just wrapped up at least one SJ end-of-year award.

 

Yeah, I think we're done here.

 

This.

 

But did you get any deer?

 

Yep. That.