Simmons on Boston beat writers ...

Only to 'keep up,' much like a computer tech has to read "PC Weekly."

You don't want to do it, and you know you'll regret it, but you have to do it.

No one willingly reads "War and Peace" twice a week.

 

I rarely read it, and when I do, I shift into "super-scanning" mode, just roaring over it to see if there are any interesting-looking paragraphs I should bother to stop and read. Usually not.

 

The few times Simmons connects, it's instructive to see what choices work. But the on-base percentage is so low, you'd think he was the 2007 Sammy Sosa.

 

Or the career Jose Offerman. OK, jokes aside, I've read Simmons, oh, 5-6 times. Liked most of those columns. He's a definite fan of the Celtics. I'd read what he has to say every bit as much as I'd read Ryan. I'll give Simmons the benefit of the doubt that he watches most Celtics games; you can't fake the hurt that comes with being a big fan of a team that has sucked for the better part of 15 years. I just don't read enough of Simmons to see the days he swings for the fences and hits air molecules over them.

 

I'll agree with the wife sentiment. I once came damn close to making fun of Gene Keady's wife in college -- if you've ever seen her, you'd know why -- but I erased the line. Even though I'm still pretty immature, it just didn't seem right.

 

I'd never bring her up in print, myself. That's way too far for me personally.

I was just responding to whomever said she wasn't ugly.

It is tough, though. Simmons takes shots at womens' looks all the time, with the WNBA being a frequent recipient.

And then people take shots at him and he acts like GW Bush in that one debate with Kerry, like he's going to throw a fit and start crying. Grow up, Bill.

 

Six guys just looked at me wondering why I was laughing so loud

 

I know he's the voice of the fan, but I would love to have Simmons spend six months on a beat and see how quickly his writing style changes. I do read him occasionally, but most of the time, it's a quick read just to see what he's writing on.

 

Indeed, the rips on the beat guys are completely uncalled for.

Where in his early days on espn.com e ws funny and somewhat original, now Mr. Simmons sounds like a bitter blogger type. The ones who failed as real journalists (Hi Bill!) and now spout off nonsense on the Web. And then wonder why they can't get access.

Simmons used to be better than that. But his recent mailing it in has reached its absolute nadir with this Celtics piece. Maybe he's thinking he'll start justifying his new contract with his NEXT piece.

 

Is Simmons even a journalist?

I mean, he just opines and never has any sources on anything. Is what he does journalism, or is it non-fiction humor?

My friends think he is god (Sox fans of course). They have no idea how much an abomination a 4,000 column like that is.

He can be funny, but he has no versatility. Ya think he could right a sad story, or a hard hitting column? It's fluff.

 

He used to be a journalist--covered preps for the Boston Herald and freelanced for the Boston Phoenix before he started his old site. Never saw his old stuff, but people who worked with him said he was good.

 

Hammer. Nail. Head.

That's what Bill is, at his core. He's good at it, but that's ultimately what he is. And a damn self-centered one, at his worst.