Sick day observations

So, I'm home on the couch for much of Sunday and Monday, sick with this lung crud that's closing whole schools in my area. Watched a ton of TV. Some observations:
Thank you, Hanes. First, your commercial with Marissa Tomei was a nice homage to a longtime crush. Now, you've superceded those and given SportsJournalists.com masturbation nation another reason to live by putting Jennifer Love Hewitt in a bra commercial. Inspired, gentlemen.
Ellen Degeneres is funny... kinda. Kind of like that nebbish, Bob Newhart-kinda way. Not usually my cup of tea, but if someone can laugh at themselves and not be too much of a bore, they're okay in my book.
Just when you think you've heard the most ridiculous set of side effects for a drug you're ever going to, U.S. drug companies top themselves again. My favorite had always been the social anxiety treatment that slid the little nugget in at the end of the disclaimer that it might cause flatulence and acne -- two things designed to make the socially meek confident in any situation. But now, I give you Loestrin, which is designed to curtail the length of Aunt Flo's stay for women. The side effects? Oh, nothing. Just "possible blood clotting, stroke and heart attacks." Weeeeeeee!
Is there a dumber bitch on the face of the planet than the little blonde on the View? Elizabeth, I think. Connecticut upperclass rearing, I'm guessing. Annoying as fuck, I know. So, this chick's qualification to get a job working with Barbara Walters was what? SURVIVOR? Really? Wow. How did the other castmates not do a Lord-of-the-Flies-meets-Starman-Justice job on her ass?
Quincy, M.D. was a flat-out playah. Airs on the local independent station. Klugman? You 'da man. Different girl every episode, and they're JDV hot. Palpably, demonstrably hot.
nyQuil is one helluva beer chaser.
Someone has to do something about Oprah. This is a clear-cut cult. I'm starting to see parallels between O and Forrest Whitaker in "Last King of Scotland" and it's frightening me. That goes for her little bitch Dr. Phil, too.
How do housefraus watch this shit day-in, day-out?

 

They watch because they're members of the cult. Clearly.

 

They don't watch it non-stop day in and day out.

They mix in a few soap operas along the way.

Now, get back to work, you slacker.

 

every time the blonde chick on "the view" speaks, something awful's going to come out of her mouth. she's hot, though, so that gets her through life. if she looked like rosie or star jones, yikes!!

unlike the young one they fired for being stupid back in the day, mrs. hasselbeck isn't a dummy. she's just a right-wing witch.

p.s. every day's a sick day for me -- i work from home -- so i'm waaaay too familiar with "the view," oprah, ellen and tv reruns. gotta kill time between phone calls.

 

Not a sick day, but another afternoon home as Mr. Mom ... and this one's wonderful.

Sitting here with my new wireless access point, laptop open and Jake cooing and giggling away as the breeze rolls in from two open living-room windows. Murphy lays stretched out atop a bench below one window, his head resting inside the sill.

Life is good when you can appreciate the subtle beauty.

 

uh... wha? which one's she married to (so i know which one to hate more than the other)?

 

tim.

 

Given how big the rest of Jennifer Love Hewitt is getting, I hope the commercial just focused on her boobs.

 

John -- Sorry. Hadn't noticed. She may not even have legs as far as I've noticed. I'm not a big fan -- wouldn't watch her show unless she was nekkid -- but she does have a very nice rack. Can't remember who, but some comedian was talking about her show recently and said that, unfailingly, the ghosts' first question to her is "Are those real?"

 

pardon me while i start construction on little voodoo doll with male pattern baldness.

 

mrs. shockey watches the show every week. says it helps her wind down. but even she's told me jen love hewitt seems to be spreading below the waist. is this true? she had been a skinny with big breasts, no?

 

yea, she has.

But JLH has a show now?