Scientologists Flock To F-L-A

http://news.aol.com/story/_a/florida-city-mecca-for-scientologists/20070924162709990001

Gator fans or the 'Noles?
You make the call.

 

You're being a suppressive person, Fenian. Expect a phone call shortly.

 

Get thee behind me, Thetan!

 

Xenu has my back, Doc.

 

Well shit. I forgot you were an OT IX.

Kneel before Xenu!

 

My inner clam is holding me back.

 

That area is my hometown, and it's freaky as hell walking around there. Sometimes you just want to grab people by the shoulders, shake them and scream "it's all a scam! Are you too stupid to see that!"

There's an outlet mall in Sarasota (about 45 minutes away) where passers by are encouraged to take a "stress test." What they don't tell you is that it's one of their e-meter thingies.

I keep telling myself that the next time they ask me if I want a stress test I'll say, "Do I look like a fucking idiot?" Next time I'll just shout, "Hail Xenu! Hail Xenu!".

Also, I was looking for work in the area (outside the sportswriting biz) and I found a job that looked pretty good. On the about us section, the business said they followed the economic principals of L. Ron Hubbard. Scratch that one.

 

Holy cow.
Between that and Crazy Catholic Guy's personal town, fringe religion seems to be a growth industry in Florida.

 

Always had a good time at spring training there, as Clearwater passed the only real test of a good spring training town -- it wasn't Winter Haven.

 

Have always enjoyed Clearwater Beach. One of my favorite Florida beaches. Can't say I ran across any Scientologists there.

Or at the dog track.

 

I was in vacation in Florida a couple years ago. Went to Clearwater for a bit, I really enjoyed it, but I always felt there was something odd about the place.

I didn't go to spring training there, but it does seem like it would be a good spring training town-I mean, it's no Fort Myers, that's for sure.