Rules of Boozing

So true...

8. When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails.

And raising a shot off the table, making eye contact and nodding your head is a toast as well. Maybe you are allowed one or two words, but anything as long as a complete sentence is too long of a quote unless it is an occasion.

 

My go-to toast: "Here's to honor. Get on her and stay on her."

Haven't done a shot in a while though. Becoming a home-brewer eliminates the need for a bar.

And this is my fave: 81. If you’re going to drink on the job, drink vodka. It’s the no-tell liquor.
It reminds me of working in TV and having to do the noon show.

 

A must read - Jim Atkinson wrote a handy guide called The View From Nowhere - I took it with me on all my travels and was truly disappointed when I found that they built the Ronstadt (yeah the same family) Transit Mall on the site of one the bars mentioned in Tucson.
http://www.texasmonthly.com/story/bar-bar

 

It sucks that the very first rule is so wildly outdated. I wish I had lived in the days when disappearing was a plausible thing.

 

I loved Modern Drunkard, but a lot of that list is crap.

'Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it was all good times every jackass would be doing it.'
That's right and true.

 

Must be a high class mag. Missing "go ugly early".

 

Other than Paddy's Day, I don't really do shots with people.
Friend died in 2011, we did shots the night after the funeral.

In general, we drink our hootch in tumblers.
Or as I like to say - a nervous glass.

 

And if you can't come in her, come on her!

 

Whoa, whoa...whoa! That's a lot to remember when you are drunk.

 

My crew's general shot toast is to simply raise your glass, nod, and away she goes. Occasionally, someone will actually say "Raise your glass," and that's enough. If there is a specific remembrance or congratulatory toast it's just "(Person's Name)" followed by the raising of glasses. If there is anything more than that said, it had better be AT a funeral or wedding or something.

 

Rule of boozing I reconfirmed last weekend ... if you mix IPA, light beer, vodka, red wine, bourbon, scotch and more beer during a marathon session, the next day is going to SUCK.