Roast of Joan Rivers

No kidding. Annoying would be a better description.

 

I heart Kathy Griffin. She talks like me...not the voice, but the speed and the tangents and the talking with the hands.

 

fixed

 

Due to this new development. Friendship off.

 

YOU'VE BEEN AROUND ME! THIS IS NOT NEWS!

(is the engagement still on?)

 

I meant more that you heart Ms. Griffin. She's incredibly annoying. You're only slightly annoying, with your cotton candy and all

And yes, it is.

 

Cotton Candy is what god's gift to earth would be if god existed. Who thinks of spinning and heating sugar into a happy fluffy ball of joy? Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

P.S. you do realize the main tenet of our future marriage (making fun of other people) is what Kathy Griffin does, right?

 

Yes, but she's not funny when she does it.

 

"hugh Hefner is so old his first condom was made out of bark"

 

Parents have a much harder time with people attacking their kids than they do with people attacking them. Or the kids have with people attacking them. Even if it is for a roast.

 

Two goodies that I remember:

Lisa Lampanelli on Pamela Anderson: "She dated Scott Baio and the lead singer from Poison, and was married to the drummer from Motley Crue. Her life story should be a VH-1 special called 'I Fucked the 80s.'"

Jeffrey Ross during the Larry the Cable Guy roast: "Warren Sapp on 'Dancing With the Stars' looked like a leather couch during an earthquake."

And the best line I ever heard about Joan Rivers came from Tony Kornheiser on his radio show several years ago: "Her face is pulled so tight you could play 'Wipeout' on it."

 

I loved the Bob Saget roast, if for no other reason than Norm MacDonald's brilliant anti-roast.