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Road Trips

Discussion in 'Anything goes' started by busdriver, Feb 23, 2007.

  1. busdriver

    busdriver Member

    In a few weeks will be taking a nice trip to Gatesville, and I was thinking two things.
    1.) maybe someone could give me a short cut that wont take me 4 hours
    and
    2.) What is the longest trip you have taken? that had nothing to do with work.
    I thought it might be a nice change to hear about some funny road trip stories.
    I have always wanted to travel but never went to far. So I am excited to make this trip and Hope it will be the first of many.
     
  2. alleyallen

    alleyallen Guest

    I know they're not as far away but didn't you also take a road trip to Brenham and Galveston? ;D
     
  3. busdriver

    busdriver Member

    I took those trip with someone special and will never forget them. But we can't get everything back that was once had. And this one is on my own no one else going with me, and now the trip may be canceled.I will have to see.
     
  4. slappy4428

    slappy4428 Active Member

    Ann Arbor to Minneapolis -- 10 hours; Ann Arbor to the Michigan border in 2:05 -- to the Loop in 3:15...
     
  5. KYSportsWriter

    KYSportsWriter Well-Known Member

    Longest road trip: My hometown to Frankfort to pick up my girlfriend at the time; from Frankfort to Lexington for lunch; then from Lexington to Cincinnati where I had to stop for gas; and from Cincy to suburban Dayton (if there is such a thing) to pick up some furniture I never fucking used.

    I left home around 9 that morning and didn't get back home until 2:30 or so Saturday morning. Around 550 miles round trip, 12+ hours on the road, but the drive back home is one I'll never forget. :D
     
  6. melock

    melock Active Member

    Make sure you have papers and trees. It would be a crime if you forgot them.

    Just went from up north to Florida a few weeks back with a stop over in Mytrle Beach. 10 hours to Mytrle Beach and then 10 more to South Florida with plenty of stops at strip clubs along the way.
     
  7. Flip Wilson

    Flip Wilson Well-Known Member

    Gatesville? You're taking a road trip to Gatesville, Texas?

    If so, be sure and go to the drive-in. During the week, it's $5 a carload and you can bring in your own food and beverage. And FWIW, the first house my wife and I seriously considered buying was in Mound, a suburb of Gatesville.
     
  8. bigpern23

    bigpern23 Well-Known Member

    Six baseball games (at Shea, the Vet, the Jake, Wrigley, Comerica and PNC) in eight days, all on the road in a Mustang convertible with my best friend. Added in stops at Notre Dame and the Big House in Michigan (just to see the buildings, no games).

    One of the best trips of my life. Too many stories to detail here, but man, what a great trip. Anytime a bar manager opens a closed establishment and gives you free reign of the alcohol, it makes for a great trip.
     
  9. John

    John Well-Known Member

    My summer's in college were nothing but road trips west to places like Santa Fe, Durango, Moab, Aspen and dozens of other places. I usually had my car packed when I went to my final exam (thus explains my poor performance) and I never really knew where I was headed when I left town.

    Ten to 15 hours on the road a day was pretty routine because I didn't go to college anywhere near Arizona.
     
  10. pressboxer

    pressboxer Active Member

    I used to work in a little burg about an hour NE of Dallas.

    One summer I bought a convertible and a Jimmy Buffet box set, dropped the top and drove to Key West. It took about 28 hours straight through by myself, but that included a couple of one-hour meal/fuel breaks where I spent most of the time letting my mind unwind. The last 10 or so hours went something like: stop for fuel and a one-liter Mountain Dew, guzzle the Dew and put in a big pinch of snuff, drive until bladder forced the next stop (about two hours), repeat. Driving back a week later on I-10, I had the pleasure of driving through the remnants of a tropical storm from Tallahassee to Slidell.

    The next summer, a former co-worker got married in St. Louis the same weekend the Royals played the Cardinals. Another friend lived between Milwaukee and Chicago, so I popped up there for a few days. That Monday, Houston at Milwaukee was the only MLB game on the schedule, and the Rangers started a three-game series at Wrigley the next day. I was still looking for more baseball after the Thursday game and noticed that Oakland was opening a series at Cincinnati on Friday. That was six games in four ballparks in seven days. The drive from Cincinnati back to Texas took something like 16 hours.
     
  11. pallister

    pallister Guest

    I don't fly, so I drive everywhere. It seems like every destination is roughly 18 hours away. I usually drive 12-13 hours the first, stop somewhere and check out the town, then finish my trip the nest day early enough to get where I'm going and enjoy the day.
     
  12. BYH

    BYH Active Member

    This seems as good a place as any to tell the story of the gizz-stained undies in my duffel bag.

    I don't travel well. When I'm away from home, I get tense when things aren't going according to plan...which, you know, is a problem on cross-country trips.

    Tensions on my first cross-country trip, a spring break trip in which we drove from NYC to Arkansas and back with many stops in between--we went to the Arkansas State House the day Oklahoma City was bombed, no wonder the state troopers were eyeing us as we walked the grounds--were partially my fault and partially the fault of the organizer, who took his stick shift car even though I can't drive stick shift. So all I could do was read in the backseat, sleep and snore. Lots of pictures were taken of me with my mouth agape. Hardy har har.

    The second trip--a trip from New England to Kansas for my best buddy's wedding in August 1998--was almost entirely the fault of the jackass who invited himself at the last minute. My buddy invited me (the best man), two other guys we'd been buddies with since high school and his brother-in-law (who was also one of his groomsmen). Four guys in a rented car...a bit tight for space, and we weren't quite sure how the trip would go with a guy we'd known mostly as our buddy's brother-in-law, but nothing we couldn't handle. Untill the groomsmen's brother invited himself on the trip days before our departure.

    So five guys in a rented car. And the fifth guy was a complete fucking loser with zero redeeming qualities. All he could talk about was the size of his cock, how much sex he had and how far he could ejaculate. We barely managed to co-exist for most of the trip.

    On the day of the wedding, he was among the loud drunkies who decided we should leave that night instead of the next morning. Which would be great, except I was the only guy among us not drinking and I was fucking exhausted from running around all day as the best man. But it didn't matter, I was outvoted. So I got to drive thru Missouri in the middle of the night. Can't you fuckers afford highway lights? Dark-ass state.

    I convinced the fools to let me shower at my buddy's house to refresh myself. I shower, dress and come out to throw my dirty clothes in my duffel bag...which has a foreign pair of underwear in it. I go "Hey who tossed his dirty drawers in my bag?" Dickweed goes "I did. And they're more than dirty."

    After some hemming and hawing, he fessed up: He'd gotten a classic 11th grade handjob from one of the bridesmaids. And THIS WAITING-FOR-HIV MOTHERFUCKER THREW HIS FUCKING SEMEN-STAINED TIDY WHITIES IN MY BAG. I went fucking ballistic. He took 'em out (damage was done, thanks) and said I should calm down, it was just a joke. I was mad the whole way home. Didn't help that the groomsman decided we had to be back by 10 pm the next night so he could get eight hours of sleep before taking the car back (I wish I was making this up), nor that I couldn't sleep in the backseat despite my exhaustion, nor the fact one of our buddies decided to eat an arby's sandwich at 4 am and then complain for the next hour about how his stomach was killing him. NO SHIT ASSHOLE YOU ATE AN ARBY'S SANDWICH THAT HAD BEEN SITTING OUT THERE FOR A DAY.

    I was sniping at underwear hand job guy the next 12 hours or so. Somewhere around Pennsylvania, we stopped for food, and I said I'd walk to Pizza Hut to get grub because I didn't want Subway. Semen guy goes apeshit on me, telling me I've been selfish the entire trip and that I wasn't being fair to his brother, who was driving the car. I said it wasn't very fair that he threw his gizz-stained underroos in my duffel bag.

    I asked him why he couldn't wait until he got home for a meaningless hand job from someone he doesn't even know. He told me I had no right to say that, that he cared for whatsherface very much and their "experience" meant a lot to him. I asked him if he knew her name and if he had her email address. Then I told him I'd fight him in the parking lot. Fortunately, his brother steered him away, because this guy would have beaten me into 2002.

    We didn't say anything to each other until we got to the groomsman's house in Connecticut, at which point dickweed said goodbye and offered to shake my hand. I ignored him...and spent the trip to my parents house yelling to my other two buddies about what a piece of shit the guy was. Then I washed my clothes when I got to my parents. Repeatedly.

    So anyway, I don't like to travel because I worry someone's going to throw semen-stained undies in my bag.
     
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