Powerball

Recent articles on Powerball say 75% of the winners are computer generated cards.

 

Jersey Mike's is a good back-up plan when the winner is broke in a few years.

 

I would travel two weeks out of every month. Two weeks resting, two weeks traveling.

All that would have to wait until the kid is out of school, but that's what we would do.

 

I'd put it all in my DraftKings account and take my chances on doubling it!

 

Just to throw this off the rails...

What's the max bet on Draft Kings? No limit if you can find someone else to bet you?

 

I would do a few things right away. One of them would be find where my last newspaper boss is working now, then give each of his employees enough to retire, leaving that bastard in a complete lurch.

Then I would buy a shitload of rundown houses in the inner city and rebuild them to solid middle class homes and give them away to families in need. And they would have to be solid, two-parent families who would be much more likely to keep the house up.

Then I would move into a suite on a cruise ship and also rent out cabins for friends and family to join me throughout the years.

 

I bought more tickets (5) than ever before for last night's drawing, then I got home and had to wash some clothes and pack for a flight this morning, so I threw my jeans into the machine and, of course, left the tickets in one of the pockets and ruined them. When I woke up I was pretty relieved not to hear that a winning ticket had been purchased at the gas station down at the corner.

As for the winnings, I'd launch a nationwide chain of subsidized group homes for developmentally challenged folks that integrates transportation for work and recreational activities.

I'd also buy a '64 GTO (three carb) then blow through whatever remained partying with Johnny Football in Vegas.

 

There's a $5,300 entry fee NFL league (30 players; $50K to 1st). Then, it drops down to $1,060.

Edit: My mistake. I now see $10,600 entry fee leagues in NFL and NBA.

 

That's a lot lower than I thought it would be.

I was thinking a guy might form a $100,000 two-player league. But that really jumps the gambling shark.

 

I would sincerely hope I could get laid without paying for it.

 

Hell, I'd buy Chef a new toe or two.

 

I'd take the lump sum and quit my job after meeting with a good financial adviser. Before leaving my job, I would buy new computers and cameras for the office. Pay off all the bills. Invest a majority of the money. I'd buy a house, nothing terribly fancy (maybe about $300K or so). Wife would like a minivan, so I'd buy her a Honda Odyssey. I'd buy myself a used Cadillac CTS-V wagon as a daily driver. They don't make them anymore, so I'd have to get one used. Probably get either a C5 Corvette Z06 or an early C4 Corvette, since I've always wanted one since seeing a red 1985 on display at DisneyWorld when I was a kid. I'd take it my mechanic and have it fixed up, with a modern LSx motor. While there, since my mechanic is a good friend and a great guy who opened his own shop last year, I'd ask him what he needs for his shop (or if there's a new shop he'd want) and pay for that. Plus whatever cars he's working on at the time, I'd pay for those repairs anonymously. Maybe I would talk him into showing how to fix cars. I learned some basics before I got married, never more than basics like changing oil, plugs, etc. but I would have the time to learn more.
There are so many organizations, groups and charities I'd want to help, especially with Christian/church slants. I would hire someone to find out what the needs are of various groups I'd consider supporting, then take that information to my financial guy and come up with a plan. I'd do things the Dale Earnhardt way: any support or donations I'd give would be anonymous. I'd want to help out people purely from my heart, not for the publicity. Any donation would come with a caveat: if it's made public I was the one giving the money, I take the money back. That was how Earnhardt did things and I'd do it the same way.
I would want to volunteer as much as possible. Food banks/pantries, Salvation Army, wherever. Help out some friends with big financial needs. Set up a scholarship at WAZZU, plus help build up the one there my dad set up in my mom's memory. Buy season tickets for WAZZU football. Travel, maybe buy a decent RV for that purpose. I'd want to return to Indy for the 100th 500, plus catch other big races like the Monaco Grand Prix, LeMans, the 24 Hours of Daytona.
I'd help family as well. Help my bro pay off his bills. Fix up my Honda and give it to my niece for her 16th birthday in April. Surprise my best friend with credentials for him and his son to the Indy 500, stuff like that.
Like George Costanza said, I think I'd be a kick ass philanthropist.