Potty Training vs. Cover 2: The SJ parenting wars

Don't let them beat you vertically. Keep everything in front of you. Let them take what they can in the flats or out of the backfield.

;D

 

The world is a better place because I do NOT have children — that I know of.

I'm still to young and dumb.

A couple of co-workers in the newsroom give me hope for the future. One had his first daughter at the age of 47, and another two years later because "(the first) will need somebody to be around when I'm gone or when I'm broke or both."

Somebody else in the newsroom is 47 and has a 5-year-old son.

I've got time. And the world is without one screwed-up 3-7 year old.

So "Yeah Me" for being smart/lucky in my 20s. And "Yeah Parents because I'm sure you're doing a better job of raising children than I ever would have in the last decade."

 

In the last six months, I've dived head-first into parenting.

Met a woman more than a year ago, became friends and, eventually, we decided to start dating. That came with one "small" caveat - the approval of her two sons, eight and 12.

And it worked. They love me, and I love them. I made the conscious decision to not be their father, because he was in their life. I just wanted to be the guy that wasn't giving them grief - I told the oldest how to deal with a bully in a way his mother would never have approved of, and I played video games all day with the youngest, when he had to come home from school early because of the dreaded accident (yeah, that one).

But things are about to change in a big way. I moved 700 miles away at the beginning of June, and they are joining me in two weeks. They'll see their dad during the holidays, on spring break and summer vacation. But for eight months a year, I am the major father figure in their life. It's scary and daunting. I am sure I am going to make a 100 mistakes, and just try to tell myself I'll do a 101 things right to even it out.

I still want to be the guy who doesn't give them grief, as impossible as that might be. And, as they become teenagers, I suspect a large majority of my job is to protect them from their mother (who is a great mother, but is very protective of her two little boys).

I know cover two like the back of my hand. I do not know what I'll do the first time the oldest comes home drunk.

 

Thanks! Now I know.

 

And knowing is half the battle.

Also, Moddy is a very smart man.

 

Lots of people without kids have good theories. But they're pretty much theories until you get the 4-year-old stripping naked in less than two seconds and headed for the carp pond at Disney's Animal Kingdom like he's LaDainian Tomlinson just getting behind the safety. Don't ask

 

Bang on.

I have three sons. The eldest is 22 and the twins (fraternal) are 20.

They are (and I'm sure HC will attest to this) fine young men and a credit to the under 25 Club.

Sometimes, at the end of the day though, you wonder how much control you have over how your kids turn out.

One thing (and Moddy would probably agree on this) is that we had "rules & regs" which we applied equally to all three.

That said, because of the different personalities involved we also had to be flexiible. One of the twins was (and is) a little different than his two brothers. We gave him a little extra slack but a very short leash.

The only thing their mother and I were fairly fierce about when they were infants/toddlers was establishing a schedule and sticking to it.

Dinner at 6:00, bath at 7:00, story time at 7:30, lights out at 8:00.

I believe yoiunger children like the security that a schedule provides but that's just me.

Funny thing about parenting advice: we never sought it nor did either of our parents provide it unless asked.

I do remember however a moment of sheer terror when we brought the twins home from the hospital. The two of them and an 18 month old.

Still freaks me out.

 

Hell yeah, he made it. He runs like the wind -- well, a stumbling wind -- and I run like the 300-pound 42-year-old I am. But I was closing fast at the finish until the left calf tightened up like I'd been shot with a spear gun.

Disney folks said it was far from the first time. But buck naked, I asked? "Yeah, that one's new," said the head of security as he laughed and patted me on the back.

I kept telling the kid not to do that again. He just kept giggling uncontrollably.

Luckily my kids haven't dropped a cuss word yet. OK, the 6-year-old said the P-word once but we were hoping he was talking about a cat and let it go.

And JR, same schedule for ours. Variance from the routine makes them cracky as hell.

 

JR,

The owner of the seafood restaurant that was my first job had, when I left for college, four children. The oldest (boy) was three, the next (boy) was 18 months and newborn twin girls. Suffice to say, they were old-school catholics.

 

that never changes, which means the kids' parents are doing a swell job. kids tend to push their own parents further, especially at home, 'cause that's where they're most comfy.

but you can judge how well a kid is being raise, i contend, by how they respond to folks other than their parents. our boys are only an occasional handful to us.

but to their grandparents, aunts and uncles, coaches, teachers and any other adults, they're angelic. polite and well-behaved. same way in school never, ever have had a behavioral prob with any teachers, etc.

kids have to have an outlet. let that be at home, within reason, of course. as long as they behave when out in the real world, or with babysitters, etc., the parents have done a swell job, imo. that's a darn good barometer.