Poll: Date or not?

OK, I'm getting back into this dating thing, and I'm already at a loss. I have this friend I haven't seen in awhile, but we trade messages on Facebook and keep in touch. I suggested we hang out one of these days, and we decided on Thursday. I asked if she wanted to dinner or drinks, and she replied with both.

Now I'm not sure if it's just friends getting together to catch up or a possible first date. I'm not sure if I'm supposed to pay now.

Is it a date? No? Could it become one as the night goes on? I'm confused. ???

 

Split the costs and enjoy your time. If she wants friends to come along to feel more secure, let it happen, maybe bring that up to feel out the waters. If you haven't talked in a while, then I don't see how it will be a first date. Have fun and don't think of it as a date, because if you do and she doesn't, the night could be long.

 

I think I would approach this as a meet and greet to get to know each other once again. If things go well, then you ask her out and that would count as a date.

 

Treat it as an open-ended thing to see how it goes. Split the costs, like Mayfly said, but be open to picking up the drinks if it starts to develop.

 

I think it definitely could become something as the night goes on, but you're not going to know until you get there. So go in with the expectation that it's just a friendly meeting, but keep your eyes out for signals.

 

Good advice. I was about to say, you (as in Bucknutty) said you suggested meeting.

 

If she plays with her hair or touches your arm during the night when you are talking, you better pay for dinner. In fact, I'm 85 percent sure she is looking for you to pay because if she agreed to drinks and dinner, she is looking for more than friends.

One question.

Are you picking her up in your car or are you meeting her there?

 

Good question...I should ask that.

 

When in doubt, always pay. It's the gentlemanly thing to do, even though we're a dying breed.

 

93, your advice is good, but on the other hand, some things are inaccuracies. If she plays with her hair or touches his arm, it could be old friends just going back to the way things were before. If they were already semi-physical with touching and stuff, then I would think little of it.

Suppose he does pay for everything, and nothing happens afterwards, not that night but just in general. Why would he want that? Split the costs, and if nothing else, pay for the drinks, but do not buy too many drinks to make her think you just want her to get liquored up. If the conversation at dinner changes to a more intimate level, then you can think about paying for the meal, but only if the conversation or touch gets more intimate than the beginning. Don't put yourself out there trying to impress her by buying the meal.

 

She can always pay next time.

 

Wait...since when are there Yankee fans who are gentlemen?

Seriously, go into it open-ended. You'll probably get a much better feel for what she has in mind once you are face-to-face.

More importantly, decide going in what you want it to be. If you really want it to be a date and find out she doesn't, well, at least you know to draw the line right then and there. It is VERY difficult to get out of friend mode when a woman puts you there....but it's impossible if you don't make a move to change things.