Plaschke tries so hard to avoid lauding Brady, he rambles on strangely . . . . .

There's Trust in His Eyes

And it is pure (read: terrible) poetry.

Around the hotel table sat Dodgers executives discussing trades.

In the corner sat the old scout watching television.

Around the hotel table they were talking about dumping Milton Bradley and wondering whom they should demand from the Oakland A's in return.

In the corner sat the old scout who has never worked with radar gun, computer or even stopwatch.

Just like good scouts do. Good scouts never use scouting tools. They trust their goddamn eyes, and their guts, and their spleens. Why?

Because Old Hoss Radbourn was not discovered with a computer, dargbloomit! He was discovered because 130 year-old Petey "Garbageface" Krunkston, who had been a rookie league manager for 142 years and had seen a goddamn ballgame or two in his day, woke up one morning with a wart shaped like a flame on his left arm, and he turned to his wife of 186 years Edna Mae and he said, "The flame mole's back, darlin.' I's a gone and what been done and moseyed to the ballpark -- there's sure to be a great future prospect a-lurkin' about, iffin' the flame mole done appeared-a-mafied on m'arm!" And he did go down there t' ol' Brasston Park, and sure 'nuff, a 4 year-old Hoss Radbourn was thar, an' he was a-throwin' and a-hittin somethin' fierce! And bloogburrmit if Garbageface didn't sign that 4 year-old right then and there! And he became a Hall-of-Famer!!!!!

Around the hotel room table, someone mentioned an unknown double-A outfielder named Andre Ethier.

In the corner, the old scout jumped.

Is Plaschke the most overblown prose artiste in the business, or what? In the corner...around the hotel table...in the corner... I swear, I think Plaschke believes he is the walking embodiment of James Earl Jones's character in "Field of Dreams." People will come, Bill. People will read. People will vomit.

"Wait a minute!" shouted Al LaMacchia. "I know Andre Ethier!"

In a gait slowed by years of climbing bleachers, LaMacchia walked over from the television to the table.

With Dodgers executives staring at him in amazement, the old scout began to sell.

Were they really staring at him "in amazement?" Were you there, Plaschke? I find it hard to believe that in an organizational meeting to discuss prospects the team might want to acquire, that when a scout started talking about a AA prospect, the rest of the organization "stared at him in amazement."

GM: We need some good minor leaguers.

Scout: Hey! I know some minor leaguers!

GM: (falls off chair in dismay) Ga-ga-ga-ga-ga goink!!! This is our lucky day!!!!!!!

He was on the phone, and it sounded as if he was crying.

"You're writing something about an old fella like me?" said Al LaMacchia.

He's 85, and he's been scouting for 51 years, and he can't believe anybody still cares.

I tell him I am writing the story because the Dodgers still care.

For the first time since Fred Claire was their last world championship general manager, the Dodgers are listening to their older scouts again.

They are reading reports scrawled in aging penmanship. They are evaluating players based on dusted-off instincts.

Ned Colletti's new administration is still using computers, but they also value guys who have no idea how to turn one on.

"I trust my eyes," LaMacchia said. "Been good enough so far."

Colletti trusted LaMacchia's recommendation at last year's winter meetings in Dallas, and the Dodgers are in first place in August, and that is no coincidence.

I'm sorry. I can't stop snortling derisively. Hang on. ... Okay. There.

The Dodgers are 64-57. They have the worst record of any first-place team. Let's not go bragging about any aspect of their brilliant system just yet. A month ago they lost like 40 games in a row, and in most other divisions they'd be basically nowheresville.

"You cannot microwave experience," Colletti said. "The only way to get it is to live it. I want guys who have lived it."

Colletti has hired two scouts/advisors since joining the Dodgers last winter in moves typical of him but totally uncharacteristic of any other CEO anywhere.

Both of the new guys were over 70.

Get ready. Here's my favorite part.

The scout, Phil Rizzo, lives in Chicago and does nothing but attend Cubs and White Sox games.

"The guy who watched a bunch of Maddux starts and filed the reports on him?" Colletti asked. "That was him."

I am going to hit return ten times, leaving a wide open white space on this blog, so we can all reflect on how unbelievably stupid that is. Ready? Begin reflecting. Then read the rest of this post, because Plaschke has a lot more to say.









You are telling me that you needed to hire someone to tell you that Greg Maddux might be a good pitcher? I mean, the guy is old, but...he's Greg Maddux. You play in Dodger Stadium, which is pretty friendly to pitchers, generally. He's Greg Maddux. You needed a 70 year-old scout, with all of his accumulated baseball knowledge, to tell you that Greg Maddux might help your team? He's Greg Maddux.

The advisor is Bill Lajoie, a longtime baseball executive who helped engineer the trade with one of his former employers, Atlanta, for Wilson Betemit.

Everyone in the universe knew Betemit was a good young player. He was a 25 year-old SS with a .784 OPS. What are you saying?

"Scouts are my lifeblood, they see players, they know players, they can tell you things that you can't get anywhere else,"' said Colletti.

LaMacchia knew Ethier.

It required thousands of miles on his old Ford, and pages of scribbling in his little black date book.

It required a brief break for congestive heart failure — "He told me it was just a little thing, he'd be back in a week" said Colletti — and it took him all of last summer.

Okay.

I just typed "Andre Ethier" into Google. The first hit I got was from thebaseballcube.com. I clicked on it, and I learned:

in 2005, for the Midland, TX Oakland A's AA team, Andre Ethier:

G: 131
AB: 505
R: 104
H: 161
2B: 30
HR: 18
BB/K: 48/93
.319/.385/.497/.882

I also learned that at ASU, a big-time program, Ethier crushed the ball, putting up a 1.061 OPS with a 52/30 BB/K ratio, and was a 2-time Pac-10 All-Star OF.

I also learned that in 2005 he was the MVP of the Texas League, as well as the Oakland A's Minor League Player of the Fucking Year (emphasis and cussing mine).

You're telling me it took a million miles of driving and a heart attack and 368 years of baseball experience to tell that the 2005 OAKLAND A'S MINOR LEAGUE PLAYER OF THE FUCKING YEAR might be a guy who might interest you? Whatever, man. I learned it in twelve seconds with a computer.

My leg does itch a little though -- I think I have dry skin. Does that medical ailment mean my opinion counts more?

But LaMacchia made it his business to know Ethier.

"I guess that's what I do," he said. "I try to know players."

Most scouts do. Even the ones who use technology.

Working as a national scout from his home in San Antonio, where he lives with his wife of 62 years, Annie, LaMacchia would watch Ethier as he played for Oakland's double-A Midland team.

He saw him play in San Antonio, and Corpus Christi, and Frisco. He saw him taking early batting practice on 100-degree days, and running out ground balls at the end of blowout losses.

He didn't need a stopwatch to judge his hustle. He didn't need a computer to feel his swing. And when LaMacchia ever needs a radar gun reading, well, he just asks one of the scouts sitting next to him.

Luckily, one of the scouts has a radar gun. Because otherwise, LaMacchia would have no idea how fast the guy's throwing.

"The younger fellas look at me like I'm strange," he said. "But it's all in my heart and my head."

In Ethier, he saw so much potential, one day he couldn't help himself.

He walked down to the dugout railing and started giving him instructions.

Said LaMacchia: "I wanted to help the young kid, tell him not to try to pull everything, tell him to take what they gave him."

Said Ethier: "I thought he was just some crazy old man yelling at me from the stands."

I don't blame you, Andre.

A couple of old-timers quickly set the kid straight.

LaMacchia was a right-handed pitcher who won a couple of big-league games for St. Louis and Washington in the mid-1940s then became a legendary talent evaluator.

He played the game! Hey Joe Morgan -- rest easy, man, this guy played the game! You can listen to his opinions. They are valid!

I can't help it anymore. The rest of my comments will be in super-angry all-caps.

...When Ethier's name came up at the winter meetings, LaMacchia perked up as if they were talking about his son.

Logan White, the Dodgers scouting director, also had knowledge of Ethier. But it was LaMacchia's enthusiasm and information that sealed the deal.

"No question, I give Al full credit for this one," said Colletti. "He knew the guy. He loved the guy. We listened to him."

Colletti immediately asked the A's for Ethier. And, initially, he was turned down.

BECAUSE HE WAS THEIR 2005 MINOR LEAGUE PLAYER OF THE YEAR. I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I CAN EMPHASIZE THIS.

"But I kept thinking about what Al said, and I kept asking," Colletti said.

DID YOU KEEP THINKING ABOUT HOW HE WAS THEIR 2005 MINOR LEAGUE PLAYER OF THE YEAR?

When the A's wanted the Dodgers to add infielder Antonio Perez to the trade, LaMacchia again pushed Ethier, telling Colletti that the kid had a chance to be better than Bradley or Perez.

"The A's finally gave in, and we got what we wanted," said Colletti.

Did they ever. While the A's received two serviceable players who have probably reached their peak, the Dodgers received a possible rookie of the year.

A PREDICTION ONE MIGHT HAVE ARRIVED AT, KNOWING HIS MINOR LEAGUE STATS, AS WELL AS HIS FIRST-PLACE FINISH IN THE RACE TO BE THE OAKLAND A'S 2005 MINOR LEAGUE PLAYER OF THE YEAR.

Before Tuesday, Ethier led all National League rookies in batting average (.333), on-base percentage (.390) and slugging percentage (.557).

He also has an old buddy who still occasionally calls him on the cellphone and reminds him to take what they give him.

From his San Antonio home this week, LaMacchia sighed.

"I am so grateful somebody still listens to me," he said.

From the Dodgers' clubhouse Tuesday, Ethier smiled.

"Everyone thinks they do all these analyses before they make a trade, but, in the end, I'm a Dodger because of that crazy old man," he said. "I can't thank him enough."

YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN AN OAKLAND A IF HE HADN'T TRADED FOR YOU, AND YOUR TEAM WOULD HAVE A BETTER RECORD.

Once and for all:

I don't think -- NO ONE THINKS -- that scouts are worthless. EVERYONE who watches baseball and knows about baseball knows the value of scouting. It has value. Okay? It has value. It can tell you things about a player's constitution, and hustle, and all that stuff, which is definitely important.

But what has as much, if not more, value -- in nearly every single fucking possible scenario -- is the analysis of statistical information.

If you seek to invalidate the use of statistical analysis...if you denigrate it, mock it, or look down your nose at it...if you write terrible mock-poetry articles declaring the objective superiority of gut instinct and old-fashioned "stare tests" over numbers-based research...then you are a far bigger snob, a far bigger ignoramus, and a far more provincial person than those whom you target with tripe like this.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to drive 1600 miles on a pack mule to St. Louis so I can give Albert Pujols a little look-see. Want to be able to speak up tomorrow when the Boss Man asks me if we should try to trade for 'im.

 

Seahawk,

First, if you look at both Fauria's and Welker's stats, you'll see they're about the same in terms of ypc and, in Fauria's case, touchdowns.

http://www.pro-football-reference.com/players/F/FaurCh00.htm

If you look at his years in Seattle vs. his years in NE, not a lot of difference. His last 24 games with WSH and CAR when he was 35 years old, merely follow the pattern began during his last year in NE.

Patten did indeed benefit from his time in NE, but it wasn't because of Brady. It was because there was no one else to throw to. Patten did, however, have a nice year in NO in 2007.

Aside from one season, Deion Branch's numbers in NE are not significantly better than those in SEA; in fact, his ypc avg is higher in sea both seasons than it was during his best year, 2005.

As for Welker, well, you've got a gap of touchdowns, which is, in part, a function of the total offense. Miami's offense, in any facet, doesn't compare to NE's. But Welker's last year in Miami, you'll notice his ypc were the same. He performed at the same level in NE, he just got more chances.

Moss has, IMO, been to these heights before aside from touchdowns. He's had more yards, catches and greater ypc averages. Aside from Rice's 90-95, nobody's had a six-year stretch like Moss did to start his career in MIN. He is, arguably, a better receiver than Brady is quarterback.

At any rate, Brady's numbers shot up in just about every category. His receivers, meanwhile, simply had more touchdowns, as did Brady - by 22 stinking touchdowns. By the numbers, the receivers are the story. They're all relatively new except for Faulk and they're all proven before Brady.

Brady had a dream year, and somehow's that mostly his doing? Not a chance. Great player, no question. The receivers are the story.

 

Re: Plaschke tries so hard to avoid lauding Brady, he rambles on strangely . . .

I don't read Mr. Plaschke's work often enough to have an informed opinion about it one way or another, but as a matter of craft (for our younger writers and aspiring columnists) it seems to me that comparing athletes straight-up across eras is a sucker bet.

Received wisdom is always, always going to be that players were tougher back in the day. Having said that, what remains to be said? It's a bar argument and it's unwinnable and who cares. Players back then were also smaller and slower, so it's kind of a wash. My God, if you put Donovan McNabb in a time machine and sent him back to 1950, he'd scare the NFL to death. He could've worn Eddie LeBaron as a boutonniere. Same with Brady. He'd've eaten the league alive. And if you re-engineer Mr. Unitas with modern diet and training as a computer model, he might be nine feet tall, weigh 420 and throw 100 touchdowns a seasons. Who knows. And again, who cares?

There are ways to do these comparisons, I think, but they have a lot more to do with what players across the ages share in common. Some quality of persistence and ruthlessness maybe, some unswerving devotion to winning or excellence, some unquantifiable fire to succeed. Tiger Woods is more like Ben Hogan or Jack Nicklaus than he is unlike them; and Brady more like Unitas than unlike him. The rest is just numbers.

If you find yourself compelled at some point to compare one athlete to another from a different age, try to think of the things they have in common rather than just the not-very-illuminating differences in the times in which they play. Otherwise you're just another guy my age running his mouth from the stool down by the jukebox.

 

Curious. How is Paul De Podesta doing these days?

 

Which are incorrect? I love when these columnists are taken to task for the some of the lazy crap they write.
Some of these columnists are so stuck in their ways they refuse to see any sport evolve or change the way certain statistics are measured.

 

Very well put.

 

He's 35, and been with the Padres front office the last two years. Hired by Sandy Alderson, he works under Alderson and Kevin Towers. I think he still uses a computer.

 

I know where he is. It was a rhetorical question.
"Special Assistant to Baseball Operations." Next step, um..."Sr. Special Assistant..."

 

I'm not saying I was a big fan of the column. I'm not.
But, his critics bring up the same two or three columns every time. It's tiresome.
The man writes sometimes six columns a week. And, his critics pick three misfires in 13 years.

 

Re: Plaschke tries so hard to avoid lauding Brady, he rambles on strangely . . .

Oh for pete's sake. He doesn't write six columns a week. There are tons of misfires. Pretty much every time he has to analyze or critique a sporting event or team, there's a good chance there's going to be tortured logic.

He should be writing a Sunday feature in the California section called "Plaschke's People", stay away from sports, and call it a day. Just my opinion.

 

Go back to the Lakers three-peat. During the playoffs he routinely wrote 5+ columns a week.
I know. We counted them.
But, again, you and Paul De Podesta must be right. A jaded stance, for whatever reason.

 

I don't get much out of firejoemorgan, but it ripped apart a particularly awful - and I mean awful - Woody Paige column recently.