People who go off the deep end

He doesn't look like the wuss that you expect him to, but he's not that big...

 

Sorry, but if I had any inkling Screech could kick my ass, I wouldn't pummel him. He was the weakest link on a boot camp team that featured a 50-some year old lady from Happy Days. I know he has some kind of fight training and beat up some guy from Welcome Back Kotter or some shit, but I would fucking destroy Screech.

 

Having seen him in person, he's a lot bigger than you would think. I was about 10 feet away from him when they ushered him from the show... I'm almost 6-3, so he was probably 6-foot or so...

 

Not saying he'd clean you up, just saying he's no Mike Lupica.

 

That is the biggest fuckup ever.

I'd have some respect for the guy if he fell off the face of the Earth, instead of trying to salvage whatever is left of his 15 minutes by hosting American Idol Rewind ("I'm Brian Dinkleman, you may remember me from such shows as American Idol, season one") and appearing on reality shows starring F-list celebrities.

 

Maybe we could get lucky and Jonny Fairplay and Screech would just gut each other.

 

He's no Carrottop!

 

Oh, my. Where have I been?

And, sadly, without even looking this up, the band's name was "Salty The Pocketknife." I never did hear the music, though I had a good feeling what it'd sound like: Trash.

A lot of things happened to Dustin "Don't call me Screech" Diamond. He became a mediocre comedian; I once asked Mario Lopez -- really, I sat down and spoke with him -- what he thought of Diamond's stand-up act, and he showed his teeth with an Al Borland-like "I don't think so, Tim" grin and said, "Ouch."

He also didn't pay his mortgage payments and resorted to selling T-shirts and complaining whenever he had the chance. The funny part about that, at least to me, is he's spent the last few years figuratively running away from the Screech brand, and once he needed some dough, he embraced it to exploit it. He sold shirts that said, "I gave $15 to help Screech." He's a real piece of work.

Diamond, along with Dennis Haskins (Mr. Richard Belding, AKA, The Big Bopper), were the only two actors to make it through the entire series; Belding made an appearance in The College Years (during the Thanksgiving episode; so that counts for that series). What made that so impressive for Diamond, was he was about three years younger than everyone else in Good Morning, Miss Bliss. He was 10 years old in the pilot, while Zack, Nikki, Lisa and Mikey were all around 13. He felt like an outsider then, and I'm betting he's always felt that way.

That's why he hit rock bottom a few years ago, and I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's why he pushes everyone away in his life. Diamond reminds me a little bit of Elizabeth Berkley and Tiffany Amber-Thiessen: He wanted to leave his shell and will do anything in order to do it. Only he's still the dorky kid with curly hair and a squeaky voice, and he'll always be like that.

I'm a fan. But he's my least favorite of the gang. Well, except for Tori. Nobody likes Tori.

 

Wait, you interviewed Mario Lopez??!

how many pairs of underwear did you go thru that day?

 

Wow, Mikey. Good stuff, but damn, no wonder you don't get laid. If you put half the effort into women that you do into SBTB, you'd lap Wilt Chamberlain.

 

Why didn't anyone like Tori? I'm intrigued!

 

Bitch wouldn't put out. Not even for preppy.