Oscar Night 2013

Are we ready? I will be wearing black Juicy Couture velour sweatpants and a blue Nike sports bra. You?

Jessica Chastain's hair, skin, and dress are exactly the same color. Not saying that's a bad thing, just seems complex to achieve.

 

That's half hot as hell.

 

Also, if we have a drinking contest for every time they show the 4G commercials with the annoying chatty little kids, we will all be obliterated by the time they get to Best Score for a Foreign Animated Short.

 

Only half? What's the other half??

 

Amy Adams wearing the ever-popular molting goose look.

 

The sweatpants.

 

I came into this with an open mind, until Giuliana said "Jessica Chastain is a young Meryl Streep." Then I just turned into a pissed-off monkey, screeching at my TV.

Favorite blog's live-blogging: http://www.vulture.com/2013/02/fug-girls-live-blog-the-2013-oscar-red-carpet.html

 

I DO like Giuliana's haircut, but I haven't seen a full-length shot of her dress, and I'm unsure if it works for a formal dress being all down and unkempt.

 

Funniest. Visual. Ever.

 

Samantha Banks apparently would like us to know she has breasts.

About Guilana's dress, she said it was so heavy she couldn't lift the hem to show her shoes. Although judging by her emaciated arms, I question whether she could lift a can of Diet Coke.

 

Tonight, Vombatus is sporting a 2XL long sleeve Corvallis Knights baseball shirt with matching cap, courtesy of micro and the Not So Secret Santa SportsJournalists.com program.

My other half is unmentionable, but my nickname is not Short Pump.

Have fun tonight. Are we all staying up til zero dark thirty?